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Slowed Jokes

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This asshole thought that just because some fancy, expensive vehicle, he could go as fast as he wanted and weave inbetween cars. So I got in front of him and slowed down to 10kmph below the speed limit lmao

Fuckin ambulances I swear

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A driver slows down for a stop sign but he doesn’t actually stop

A cop sees him and pulls him over. The driver says “is there a problem, officer?” The cop said “you just ran a stop sign back there”. The driver said, “what are you talking about? I slowed down.” The cop replied “but you didn’t actually stop.” The driver said “slow, stop, what’s the diff?” The cop r...

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A lawyer gets pulled over

A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a policeman. Cop says, "License and registration, please." Lawyer says, "What for?" Cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign." Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming." Cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete s...

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An older man was driving his new Mercedes at 100 mph

An older man was driving his new Mercedes at 100 mph when he noticed a police car chasing him in the rearview mirror. He accelerated to 125 and then 155 mph. Suddenly, he thought to himself, "I've outgrown this bullshit." He slowed down, pulled over to the side of the road, and waited for the police...

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A lawyer gets pulled over by a police officer.

The officer asks the lawyer "Do you know why I pulled you over?"


"I haven't the foggiest idea," said the lawyer.


The officer replied, "You didn't make a full stop at the stop sign back there. You only slowed down."


The lawyer thinks for a few seconds then says, "If y...

Remember when you feel as if time slowed down?

It's caused by the gravity of the situation.

Stop or slow down

A cop stops a man for running a stop sign and the subject gives the cop a lot of grief explaining that he did stop.



After several minutes, the cop explained to the gentleman that he didn't stop, he just slowed down a little.



The gentleman said "Stop or slow down, what's...

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Hitler once ran a race against the top German athletes, and they all slowed down to let him win.

He thought he was the fascist man in Germany.

My computer has this disgusting virus that has completed slowed everything down.

It's called "Internet Explorer".

The eclipse did two things our political leaders cannot.

It slowed global warming and gave us all something to look up to

I drove by the local jailhouse today. The inmates were out in the yard playing football. I slowed down and yelled,

"Pass me the ball, I'm free!"

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