Sharp Object Jokes - 5 Hilarious Sharp Object Jokes

(Mentions of gore) Once upon a time, there was a very brave but very arrogant man…

This man claimed he could survive anything. He survived falls from various heights, various guns, sharp objects and even acid.

One day, he declared he was going to survive a steamroller. So this brave man went in the roller’s path…

He sadly died that day, but the most important thing ...

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An American redneck man wakes up to beaming lights blinding his vision for a moment as his vision comes into focus...

He see's standing above him 3 alien like creatures hovering over him while one pokes him with a sharp object. He screams out in pain and says, "Why the hell did you do that!?" The alien apologizes in perfect English taking the man by surprise. He then proceeds to ask, "Are you gonna do that thing wh...

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A meeting with my therapist

Therapist: How do you feel?

Me: With my hands.

Therapist: Do you deflect a lot?

Me: Only sharp objects. If it's fluffy, I just let it hit me...

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Are you sure?

So a man dies and is sent to hell.

When he gets there the devil says "hey you know what? I'm in a good mood today so I'll let you pick your eternity here from these 3 doors"

The man says ok and opens the first door.

Behind door #1 was a lion eating a man alive, every time the li...

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A Man Walks into a Barbershop with a Big "Help Wanted" Sign

A Man Walks into a Barbershop with a Big "Help Wanted" Sign. He is quickly greeted by an eccentric and very talkative barber.

"Ah! Hello friend! Welcome to my barber shop. Let me sit you down and we can discuss the work at hand."

The barber sits him down in a worn leather chair and qui...

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