UPJOKE
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Revising Jokes

I was revising an essay the other day...

when all of a sudden I deleted an entire sentence. I tried Ctrl+Z, document recovery, and everything, but eventually I gave it up as a lost clause.

Jean-Paul Sartre is sitting at a French cafe, revising his draft of Being and Nothingness.

He says to the waitress, “I’d like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.” The waitress replies, “I’m sorry, Monsieur, but we’re out of cream. How about with no milk?”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny comes home late from School one day...

...and his Dad asks, "You're late, where have you been..?"
"With Jessica."
"Doing what..?"
"Revising."
Little Johnny then picks up a snack from off the Kitchen Table and says, "Wow, these Fishcakes smell nice."
His Dad says, "Go wash your hands Son, cos they're fucking Doughnuts..!"

Four students decide to skip an exam

Four students were attending law college and were quite used to cheating and exploiting to get better grades. Their final exam was due tomorrow and they wanted to get some extra time to hopefully enhance their grades.

The plan was simple: don’t show up tomorrow, spend the whole day learning ...

Life Rules For My Son

1. Never shake a man’s hand sitting down.

2. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs ain’t one.

3. The man at the grill is the closest thing we have to a king.

4. In a negotiation, never make the first offer.

5. Act like you’ve been there before. Especially i...

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