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My Muslim coworker brought a CD version of the Quran to work today.

He got really pissed off when I asked if I could burn a copy.

An ISIS member was performing...

An ISIS member was performing a routine traffic stop looking for infidels, and stopped the car of a Christian couple. “Are you Muslim?” asked the ISIS member. “Yes,” replied the Christian man, “I’m Muslim.”
The ISIS member says, “If you are a Muslim, then recite a verse of Quran.” The Christian m...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I call my weed the Quran...

Because burning tht shit’ll get you stoned

The Bible and the Quran tell us to love each other

The Kamasutra is more specific.

Are you aware the the Quran specifically forbids dating Gorillas?

It turns out you're not supposed to have a Haram Bae.

A long time ago, in the middle east

There was a town where everyone worshipped many gods. But one day, a young boy arrived from afar, claiming to be a prophet sent by Allah. He told them to convert to Islam, or else they would receive divine punishment.

Naturally, the townspeople rejected his words, and they executed him in pub...

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a jew, a muslim, and a christian walk into a bar.

the bartender asks the christian what he'll have. and the christian says he'll have a bible. and the bartender asks what it is. and the christian says "oh it's a scotch with cinnamon"

and then the bartender asks what the muslim will have. and the muslim says he'll have a quran. and the barten...

I have a bag with a crucifix, Buddha, and the Quran inside.

Is this sacrilegious?

I have the Quran on CD...

People sure are getting upset when I said I burned it.

Why are Muslim youth the best at dealing with pandemics?

Because as a Quran-Teen, you always keep Allah by your self.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man was pulled over by a terrorist

The terrorist said " If you are not Islam, you will die"

The man raised his hands and said "I am a muslim"

The terrorist then shouted "Prove it, recite a verse from the Quran"

The man recited "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given t...

What do Muslims do during the coronavirus outbreak ?

They stay in Quran-tine

Why didn't the Muslim youth get the coronavirus?

Because he was a Quran Teen.

ISIS guy stopped the car of Christian couple.

ISIS guy stopped the car of Christian couple.
ISIS guy: Are you moslem?
Christian: Yes I am.
ISIS guy: Recite a verse from Quran.
Christian man recited a verse from Bible.
ISIS guys: Yallah-ho-snackbar, you can go.

Later Christian guy's wife: I can't believe you too...

I was so fortunate that a Muslim family was able to take me in when Social Isolation when into effect.

Now I am in Quran-tine.

A Pakistani cleric issued a new fatwa that orders you to stay in your homes and study the scriptures.

As expected, they're calling it the *Quran*tine.

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A Muslim , a Jew and a Christian stood on the sides of Vatican entrance...

An Arab dressing as a Muslim man stood at the Vatican gate with a few Quran books and leaflets about Islam to sell. There was a flag with Islamic words behind him.

Just next to him, stood an Arab dressing as a Jewish with few books of Torah to be sold. There was a flag with Hebrew words behin...

What kind of weed do muslims smoke?

Quranic

The pope dies and gets met by Jesus at the gates of heaven.

As they step inside, a ferarri pulls up and a man in red robes steps out with a beautiful blonde on his arm.

Shocked at such impropriety from a Cardinal, the pope asks Jesus what is going on.

"Oh," says Jesus, "he was a pious, celibate man his whole life, so dad gave him the opportuni...

What was the name of Iran’s first 80’s cover band ?

Quran Quran

There is a new virus which only affects Muslims.Where do they put the infected?

In the Quran-tine room!

What do you call the fruit of Islam?

Quran-berries

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