UPJOKE
lucasfilmsteve jobscarsgeorge lucastoy storyjohn lassetercompanyratatouilleshareholderwall-etoy story 3cars 2brad birdandrew stantonanimation

Pixar movies over the years

What if toys had feelings?

What if bugs had feelings?

What if monsters had feelings?

What if fish had feelings?

What if superheroes had feelings?

What if cars had feelings?

What if rats had feelings?

What if robots hadd feelings?

What if boy s...
upvote downvote report

Assistant to the President: Sir, there's a crisis - somehow, we only have one copy of Pixar's Up left in existence.

President: All right, find the person who currently owns it, and have him give it to me.

Assistant to the President: Well there's some bad news, sir ...

President: Bad news? Have him give me the DVD, I'll copy it and post it on the Internet, problem solved!

Assistant to the Pres...
upvote downvote report

TIL that Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection, except one.

He's never gonna give you Up
upvote downvote report

My buddy just lost his job at a cinema that only shows Pixar films.

He forgot to show Up.
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got my dick stuck in the center of that Pixar DVD with the old man and the balloons.

TIFU.

My dad asked me, “What’s your favorite Pixar film?”

I said, “Up. Yours?”

He said, “wow! Don’t be rude. It was just a question.”
upvote downvote report

Husband doing crossword with his wife

Husband: Emphatic no, five letters.

Wife: Never

H: Pistol, 3 letters.

W: Gun

H: Disgust, 3 letters.

W: Ugh

H: Charity, 4 letters.

W: Give

H: Female sheep, 3 letters

W: Ewe

H: Pixar movie, 2 letters

W: Up
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Five friends were sitting around, debating which Pixar movie is the greatest

After a few hours of debate, no one was willing to concede, and it was decided that a vote must be held. Unfortunately, with so few friends present, it was clear that they would need to bring the vote to the greater public. The group decided that each friend would make a plea to the subreddit of the...

I was wondering why Disney/Pixar's new movie Turning Red takes place in 2002, then I realized...

It's a period piece.
upvote downvote report

Pixar finally made a movie for kids with cancer

It’s called Finding Chemo
upvote downvote report

Have you seen the documentary from 2010 about the Pixar movie display case?

It holds Up.
upvote downvote report

The coming Pixar movie Trains has been cancelled.

It will be replaced with Buses.
upvote downvote report

My friend and I are in my house, arguing about what Disney Pixar movie we’re watching tonight.

I told him that if we weren’t going to watch The Incredibles, he would need to leave my house.

So that’s exactly what he did.

He shut Up and left.
upvote downvote report

What is Pixar lamp’s favorite restaurant?

IHOP
upvote downvote report

What was the name of that Pixar movie where a non-human duo is forced to go on an adventure after the Status Quo gets threatened?

Google: "Could you be more specific?"
upvote downvote report

I had a girlfriend and her favorite Pixar movie was "Up".

This was 2010 and she had it on blue ray, and we would watch it at least once a week at her apartment. But after like the 40th time, I confronted her and said I was tired of watching. The argument got heated; it didn't help that we were drunk. Suddenly, she pushed me and I fell on something. I turne...
upvote downvote report

Rick Astley would lend you his whole Pixar movie collection...

...because he's a nice guy. But he won't ask for them back because he knows they'll be Together Forever with You
upvote downvote report

Just saw Pixar's latest movie. Not only was it great...

... it was incredible, too.
upvote downvote report

Accidentally broke my Irish friend’s Pixar movie...

He wasn’t amused, but he did say, “You cracked me Up.”
upvote downvote report

I was phoned by Rick Astley, who asked me to borrow some Pixar DVD's...

I said "Fair enough You can have 'Toy Story', 'A Bug's Life' and 'Finding Nemo' but I'm never gonna give you 'Up'".
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Back in 2009, I got my dick stuck in a DVD player playing a Disney Pixar movie.

Turns out I really fucked up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(Nsfw) Which Pixar character is the worst one to have sex with?

Walle because he nuts and bolts.

I'm really thankful that Disney/Pixar brought us Toy Story

It means I can go to Toys R Us and walk out with a Woody without it being awkward.
upvote downvote report

So my friend, Rick Astley, asked me for some Pixar movies to watch...

I told him, "You can borrow Toy Story 1, 2, and 3, A Bugs Life, Monsters Inc., Finding Nemo, The Incredibles, Cars 1 and 2, Ratatouille, and Wall*E, but I'm never gonna give you UP!"
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The tallest hotel in the world was streaming a famous Pixar movie when they pulled the plug mid way.

They fucked Up on so many levels.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Last night I got drunk and threw up in the garbage. My wife is pissed.

Mostly because she's the one the kids are complaining to that they can't find their favorite Pixar DVD.

I took part in a boxing match where everytime I was KO'd, I'll get a Pixar movie. It has become irritating.

I get knocked down but I get Up again
upvote downvote report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This one time I got my dick stuck in the hole of a DVD of a Pixar film about an old man who made his house fly with balloons

I guess it’s pretty apparent how badly I screwed Up

Rick Astley: What do you want for your birthday? ...

Wife: Pixar's “Up” on DVD.
Rick Astley: No.
upvote downvote report

My friend: What’s up?

Me: A 2009 Pixar film.
upvote downvote report

Why did Peter Pan never grow up?

Because how can you grow a Pixar film?
upvote downvote report

I woke up this morning and realised I couldn't stand Up.

But then I realised I can't stand most Pixar movies.
upvote downvote report

Did you know that Rick Astley is actually a very generous person and an extensive movie collector?

It's true! He'll actually let you have just about any movie in his collection, with only one exception: The Disney/Pixar movie "Up." This particular movie is a favorite of his and he keeps it on a shelf so high that you actually have to get a ladder and climb it just to reach the movie. Be carefu...
upvote downvote report

Avoid distraction at all costs.

Otherwise you'll end Up is such a great Pixar movie, maybe their best?
upvote downvote report

Why did Rick Astley get fired from his job at the video store?

Because he refused to rent someone a copy of the Pixar flick "Up".
upvote downvote report

A man was voting for his favorite movie, he wanted to say it was Pixar’s UP because he loves the story about the cranky old man and the little kid. But he also doesn’t like crying in public and the opening sequence makes him cry every single time and that makes him angry. He eventually said . . .

Take my angry Up vote
upvote downvote report

so i started dating a girl and we wanted to have a "movie-off"...

we started with the saddest movies we could think of. i won with the intro to a certain little Pixar film. I really showed her up that night.
upvote downvote report

You walk into a bar and see Rick Astley sitting alone

You sit next to him and start talking

Eventually, the conversation leads to talk of your favorite Pixar movies

Rick tells you that his favorite of all time is Up, he even owns a physical copy of the movie with bonus features

You say that you've always wanted to see it but never ...
upvote downvote report

Old but gold

One day, John visited Rick to borrow some movie to watch.

John: "can i borrow some of your movies?"

Rick: "Sure thing, just follow me"

John followed rick to a room full of movies from a to z

Rick: "so what are you looking for?"

John: "oh just some family friend...
upvote downvote report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.

Do Not Sell My Personal Information