UPJOKE
priapicmalephallusadonismasculinemanlystylizedmetaphoricalgrotesqueallegoricalandrogynouszoomorphichermesindialingam

Phallic Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a phallic potato?

A dick-tater!

A pencil isn't as phallic as a

pen is.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hey Jeff Bezos, next time, can you fly that phallic-looking rocket...

up Uranus?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a phallic shaped potato growing entirely above ground?

A rootless dick-tater

Why is Darth Vader's helmet so phallic?

...because when they hid Luke & Leia from him, they removed his force kin.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a phallic, prickly plant in the desert?

A Cocktus.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When the tyrant had a massive phallic watercraft commissioned to be made from potatoes he didn't really consider its seaworthiness.

His dick tater ship didnt last very long.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

American Hospitals

Where they fuck you in the ass, then explain that $20,000 is the uninsured rate for a phallic colonoscopy

Some drug screens involve taking a strand of hair and analyzing it for illicit substances. It's called a follicle test.

Of course there are guys who try to beat that by shaving their head, but that doesn't work because the lab will just take a pubic hair instead. That's called the phallical test.

Two fishermen are sitting in a boat indulging in some wordplay.

The first one says, "If I tell you a joke that relies on *casting* the word "rod" in a phallic sense, would you find it *fishy*?"

"Oh," says the second one, "I think I can *tackle* it."

"So... *net-net*, you'd take the *bait*?"

"Oh-ho! *Hook, line, and sinker*!"

"I don't ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A chap goes to the doctor about his erectile disfunction

A chap goes to the doctor about his erection, and the kindly doctor prescribes him some Viagra. He explains to him that he needs to take it an hour before the act, so the next night the chap gets home early and prepares a romantic dinner for his wife.

He then calls her in the office where she...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.