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Outage Jokes

Don't joke about power outages

That's just dark humor

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just had a power outage during sex.

What a turn off.

So many power outages lately

No one wants to shed light on the matter

2 Blondes during power outage...

The first says: "I was just leaving home and was stuck in an elevator for 30 minutes..."

The second one replies: " That's nothing, I was at the mall and was stuck on the escalator for 2 whole hours!"

A possible reason for the facebook outage

Bruno Fernandes' penalty had hit the satellite

A man calls technical support.

“Word Perfect Technical support; may I help you?”
“Yes, well, I’m having trouble with WordPerfect.”

“What sort of trouble?”

“Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.”

“Went away?”

“They disappeared.”

“Hmm. So what does your screen ...

If PG&E goes through with the planned outage...

...then I guess we're powerless to stop them.

it must be confusing working at a mint when a power outage happens.

because when it happens, everything stops making cents.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was pooping in a bathroom with no windows when the there was a power outage.

When I had to wipe my butt I couldn't see shit.

We had a power outage today...

...and my PC, laptop, TV, DVD, iPad & surround sound music system were all shut down.

Then I discovered that my phone battery was flat and I couldn't charge it.To top it off it was snowing outside. So I couldn't play golf and I couldn't fish. I went into the kitchen to make coffee and t...

You probably didn't hear about the power outage in New York City...

I think the news should have shed more light on it.

My local doctor's office had a power outage just as I was supposed to have my vaccine. I asked if I could have it anyway, on the off chance they might still let me.

Well, it was a shot in the dark.

At night after a long power outage, the lights finally came back on in Charlize Theron's house.

When the lights returned, her housekeeper exclaimed:

Charlize, they're on!

Jesus and the Devil have challenged each other to a typing battle on MS Word

It's a close battle and they're down to the last word, when boom! Power outage!

When the power outage is resolved, all of the Devil's progress was lost, but Jesus only had one word to type!

Moral of the story: Jesus saves, and so should you.

Due to a power outage, the house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl to hold a flashlight high over her Mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby

... Little Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his feet and spanked him on his bottom And he began to cry. The paramedic then asked the wide-eyed 3-yr old what she thought about what she had just witnessed. She quickly responded 'He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place, spank ...

One small step for Man

A friend of Neil Armstrong said when you landed on the moon,
in all the excitement, how the hell did you come up with that great saying …

One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind?

Just Amazing to be able to come up with that, on the spur of the moment!

Neil said i d...

I haven’t had a server go down on me that long

since New Year at Hooters.
Edit for explanation: https://techcrunch.com/2016/08/11/reddit-is-currently-experiencing-a-major-outage/

God judges Satan vs Jesus in computer programming war.

God tells Satan and Jesus they are supposed to create the perfect computer program.

Satan starts off strong and within the first fifteen minutes has the rough architecture of his program figured out and designed.

30 minutes in and Satan is cruising along. Satan is getting all the laye...

Thanks to my internet service provider, I was finally able to read a book....

They had an outage

A psychologist visits an engineer in his hospital bed

The guy had just jumped off a bridge. The psychologist says, "Hey there Ahmed, I'm Dr. Adams, how you feeling today?" And the engineer replies, "In pain, but lucky to be alive, I guess."

Dr. Adams wants to help, so she asks the engineer about his life. The engineer tells her he came from Liby...

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