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Q: What do you call 500 neo-Nazis at the bottom of the ocean?

A: A good start.

Q: What do you call 500 triathletes at the bottom of the ocean?

A: A bad start.

Twitter have just created a keyboard shortcut that mutes all Neo-Conservative posts.

Ctrl + Alt + Right

A lemon gets sick

A lemon is walking home late one night and gets caught in a thunderstorm. With no raincoat or umbrella around, he toughs it out and paces home as quickly as possible.

Unfortunately, the lemon ends up catching a cold with some light fever and coughs from prolonged exposure in the rain and cold...

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How do you chop a neo nazi's dick off?

Kick his sister in the jaw.

A nihilist, a socialist, and a neo-marxist walk into a bar and order drinks.

“We don't sell alcohol to anyone under 18” says the bartender.

Why was Neo's mom so good at math?

Because when she was pregnant, she carried the one.

Why didn't Neo ever cuddle Trinity from behind in bed?

Because there is no spoon.

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So, a Neo-Nazi walks into a Jewish man's bar...

One day, a local outspoken Neo-Nazi walks into a bar. The owner is a devout Jewish man who was talking with his brother as the Neo Nazi walks up to bar. The Neo-Nazi orders a burger, which the bartender serves. He eats the burger, pays the bartender with a tip, and leaves.

The Jewish man's b...

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‘I was at that neo-nazi march today’ “was it any good?”

‘It was alt-right’

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What do you call uncircumcised neo-nazis?

Foreskin heads

How do you know if Neo has ED?

When he takes the blue pill.

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My friend rents out his buildings— one to the neo- Nazis, and the other to the KKK.

He is a leaser of two evils.

Trinity: "I really can't stay." Neo:

"Baby it's code outside."

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What's the difference between god and a kind-hearted neo nazi?

God might actually exist.

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In an upcoming film, Matthew McConaughey is going to play a Neo-Nazi

He’s gonna be alt-right, alt-right, alt-right.

Neo probably should have taken the blue pill

Ask Hugh Hefner.

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I posted an Asian Neo-Nazi post on facebook.

It's already got 50 reichs

People should not condemn recently blinded people.

It’s not their fault they are Neo-Not Sees.

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Why do neo-nazis drink milk?

Because they hate juice

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What was the Neo Nazi's favorite computer game?

Mein Kraft

Why did Neo have to eat his cereal with a fork?

Cos there is no spoon

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This is one of those gems thought up at 4 am, why does nobody listen to Neo-Nazis?

It's all just white noise.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to his daughter's fiancee?

You're an alt-right guy.

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What is a Neo-Nazi's favourite brand of underwear?

Rightie Whities.

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Why don't neo-nazis use the forward button on their browsers?

Because they Alt-Right instead.

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What do you call a neo-nazi that's burst into flames

A fire cracker

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The first time I heard about Neo Nazis, I was confused because of The Matrix

I was like, "There's no way Neo could be a Nazi! He lives in a place called Zion and most of his friends are black!"

Apparently Trump is a neo-Marxist

He wants to seize the means of reproduction.

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How many Neo-Nazis does it take to change a light bulb?

If they knew how, maybe they wouldn't need all those torches...

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Joke I just made up: what's a neo nazis favorite sports drink?

White powerade!

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A Neo-Nazi walks into a cafe...

He walks up to the counter and asks for a coffee

"How do you like your coffee sir, black or white?"
Says the server

"Could I have it white with no milk please"
Replies the Neo-Nazi

"Isn't that a black coffee?"
Inquires the server

...

The Neo-Nazi replies...

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Apparently the same firm rents buildings to both ISIS and Neo-Nazis.

You could say they're the lessor of two evils.

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Did you hear about the Neo-Nazi Fascist whose left arm fell off?

I heard he's alt-right now.

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I don't support Trump, but I would never denigrate his supporters

If you're a Trump supporter, "denigrate" means "to put down."

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What is the most common ingredient in the neo-nazi cookbook?

WHITE FLOUR! WHITE FLOUR! WHITE FLOUR! WHITE FLOUR!

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I got kicked out of Comic-Con for assaulting a guy who didnt know who Keanu Reeves played in The Matrix

That was the second time I've been called a neo-nazi.

Several years ago, a group of artistic polymaths decided to mathematically represent different styles of painting.

Several years ago, a group of artistic polymaths decided to mathematically represent different styles of painting.

Each of the polymaths was a leading figure in a different field of mathematics, and each pursued and studied a different style of painting. Together, they decided that if they co...

It's the year 2295...

Dude: I'm a classically trained guitarist.

Neo-90s Kid: Radical!

Dude: So anyway, here's Wonderwall.

Agent Smith

A long time ago, when Agent Smith was newly generated, he was tasked to kill the rogue program, The Oracle, and her son. He was new to the Matrix, and was unaware of her capabilities. So he tried to delete her by firing at her with his gun, though the Oracle safely removed herself and her son from d...

What do you use to heal cuts in the matrix?

Neo-sporin

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Lawyers and their dogs.

In 1989 the University of Nottingham funded a study to explore the relationship that develops between people and their dogs.

They got three people with dogs: an architect, a mathematician, and a lawyer. The took the dogs and put them in a large room, placing three biscuits in front of each d...

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A woman asks her friend whether she should date an anti-semite.

Friend: "He sounds really nice!"

Woman: "I know...but he's always spouting unsubstantiated, racist nonsense, marching, and carrying around some sort of sign."

Friend: "Oh, he's a Neo-Nazi. That's a huge red flag."

Hey Siri, teach me Kung Fu!

Neo, you need to unlock your iPhone first.

Started my Matrix Algebra class a few months ago...

I'm really confused so far. When do we learn about Neo?

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