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After an amazing 69 with his girlfriend, Kevin remembered he had a dentist appointment.

He was afraid that the dentist would smell pussy on his breath so he brushed his teeth 7 times and on top of that 2 liters of mouthwash.

As he arrived at the dentist he chewed 5 strong mints too.

The dentist told him to take a seat. Feeling confident & relaxed he opened his mouth w...

What do mouthwash and 70 have in common?

They both come after 69

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On this bottle of mouthwash it said "10 times longer lasting"

So I rubbed some on my cock and gave the wife the best 60 seconds of her life.

What do you call a statue holding some Mouthwash?

A gargoyle!

What's Helen Keller's favorite mouthwash?

Jergen's lotion.

What do you call a mouthwash for tiny scientists?

Microscope

Have You Tried

A lady on a commuter train was reading a newspaper article about life and death statistics. Fascinated, she turned to the man next to her and asked, "Did you know that every time I breathe somebody dies?" "Really," he said, "have you tried mouthwash?"

My math teacher asked me in class today "What comes after 69"?

Apparently mouthwash isn't the answer.

A man goes to the dentist for his six-month exam.

The man tells the dentist, “My teeth are great. I never use mouthwash, rarely brush my teeth, never floss, never use a breath mint, and eat onions and garlic with just about every meal. I also never have bad breath.” The dentist agrees his teeth are decent, but he will need an operation.


...

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NSFW A Trip to the Dentist

A man takes his girlfriend to his house to have some alone time. A few minutes into the Netflix and chill, things start to heat up. The man and his girlfriend start off with a little foreplay but it quickly escalates to a lot of 69.
After they finish their business the man tells his girlfriend t...

Teacher: "Alright, children, who can tell me what comes after 69? Little Johnny, how about you?"

Little Johnny: "Mouthwash."

Teacher: "Get out."

An Excellent Vintage.

A drunk walk into a drugstore and asks for a bottle of mouthwash.

"I’m not selling you that," says the druggist. "You’ll drink it for the alcohol and get sick outside my door!"

"Not true!" insists the drunk. "I have my first date in over a year, and I want to make a good impression."...

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New weights and measures

1. The ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton

3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope

4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond

5. Weight an evangelist carries with Go...

A first grade teacher asks her students, "What comes after 69?"

One student responds, "Mouthwash"

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Old man goes to the dentist.......

Old man goes to the dentist for his annual checkup. Not even a minute into it, the dentist suddenly stops and asks him.
-Sorry, but I have to ask you this. Did you do a 69 last night?
The old man is amazed!!
-Doc, how did you know? The old lady was kind randy, but I flossed, brushed my teet...

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The Salesman.

A man was walking down the street by himself one afternoon when he was approached by a salesman. The salesman the says to him "would you like to buy some mouthwash for $300?"

The man says "absolutely not that's a terrible offer." And he walks away.

The salesman catches up to him and sa...

A teacher and her student practice counting

Teacher: OK now, 61,62,63,64,65,66,67,68,69...what comes after 69?
Student: Mouthwash
That student was sent home

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Alternate meanings

From The Washington Post

1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.


2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.


3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.


4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanati...

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The salesman.

A man is walking alone down the street when he is approached by a salesman.

"Hello sir, would you like to buy this mouthwash for $200?"

The man laughs in the salesman's face and keeps walking. The salesman catches up to him and asks again, "ok, sir, how about I give a a better deal. Th...

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