UPJOKE
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What does a popsicle become when it melts?

Sticky.

What do you call a sundae that melts away and turns into garbage?

A Mon-dae

They say that if enough Antarctic ice melts more and more viruses will emerge...

I guess that means COVID is only the tip of the iceberg!

I don't like it when snow melts

Icy it as snow unsettling.

(OC)

A woman decides to go home with a guy she met at a club one night

He's tall, tanned, strikingly handsome, and seems different than most other guys she meets.

Upon arrival at his place they head straight to the bedroom where she can't help but notice a shelf full of teddy bears.

On the bottom are small teddy bears, on the middle shelf are medium-siz...

Once this whole "global warming thing" melts the ice caps

We're gonna have a canoe world order.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dave's wife is out for the night and he decides to eat some shrooms. He passes out and wakes up at the pearly gates of heaven.

St Peter greets him and explains that he's actually died from eating some bad shrooms. However, if he makes dinner for Jesus and his 12 disciples *AND* they happen to like it, he'll be revived back on earth.

He enters a huge kitchen, packed with every kind of ingredient imaginable. Dave coul...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Blonde woman is walking two dogs, one White and the other Black.

An Old lady walking down the same street notices them and since it's a breed she's never seen before, she's curious and walks up to the woman. "Wow, these dogs are adorable. What kind are they?". The Blonde smiles and goes "Which one, the white one or the black one?".

The old lady is a little...

A cute little girl walks into a pet store and asks in the sweetest little lisp, "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"

As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks, "Do you want a widdle white wabby or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabby over there?"

She, in turn blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pet shop

A little girl walks in to a pet shop and ask the owner for a rabbit the owner heart melts and says what kind of rabbit do you want a white rabbit a brown rabbit or a grey rabbit and the little girl says "I don't think my python gives a fuck "

my brain is like an overclocked cpu

it runs 2000 fps for a couple seconds then melts

What happens when you go inside in a snow suit?

It melts.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little girl walks into a pet store and says to the owner...

"Pwease sir can i have a wabbit?"

The store owner looks at the angelic creature in front of him and his heart melts.

"Of course little girl, would you like a white one, or a black one" He asks.

"Well to be honest mithter" replies the girl "I dont weally think my python gives a f...

Why didn't Confucius wear condoms

Because he who has a hot iron, melts rubber

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