I know I'm supposed to have a joke here but my 3 year old is obsessed with knock knock jokes lately and I'm out. Help a dad out here
There was a big moron and a little moron sitting on a ledge. The big moron fell off, why didn't the little one?
He was a little more on
There were 10 in the bed & the little one said...
"These Medicare cuts are ridiculous."
A man was having a bad day...
A little man sits sadly in the bar with a beer in front of him.
A large, bad guy walks along, smacks him on the shoulder and drinks his beer happily.
The little man begins to cry with desperation, sobbing.
The big one: "Don't be like that, ya plump wimp! Crying for a beer!"...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
My wife said, "I dreamed they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for a hundred dollars and the thick ones went for two hundred dollars." Chuckling, I asked, "How about the ones like mine?" She retorted, "Those, they gave away."
Not to be outdone, I said, "I had a dream too. I dreamed they were auctioning off pussies. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the tight little ones went for two thousand."
She quizzed, "And how much for the ones like mine?"
To which I replied, "That's where they held the ...
Boy scout: Sir, I found a snake, is it poisonous?
Me: No little one, this snake isn't poisonous at all
*Snake bites boy and boy immediately starts to spasm and foam at the mouth, leaving the other kids watching, horrified*
Me: However, this snake is venomous. Venom is always injected, poison is ingested or absorbed through the skin. L...
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