UPJOKE
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Keep On Jokes

Wife: “You keep on finding ways to avoid taking responsibility for your wrongdoing.”

Me: “I’m truly sorry that you feel this way.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife and I keep on collecting 5k race t-shirts, without actually participating in the races.

It’s our running joke

'Doctor, Doctor, I keep on accidentally making racial stereotypes!"

Confused Jewish guy: "What doctor?"

this one's for UA - keep on fighting the good fight!

A joke we had in Poland, dating from the times of soviet occupation (post WWII).



A border. A Polish patrol found a cow standing right on the border line, half of the cow in Poland, half on the Russian land. A Russian patrol suddenly appears and they go:

\- Davay palyaki, we spl...

Why do people keep on making jokes about the twin towers?

Because they go down so well

A vasectomy only works if you tell your wife about it

Otherwise she keep on getting pregnant

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My kids keep on taking the piss out my alzheimers..

Wait till the cheeky little buggers wake up on Christmas morning and find no eggs under the bonfire.

I keep on forgetting what the Roman numerals are for 1, 1000, 51, 6, & 500 are.

I M LIVID

I keep on telling my friends that I think one of them might secretly be an owl

But all they respond with is “Who?”

People keep talking about these "safe spaces". Well, call me old fashioned but I'm going to keep on calling them what they REALLY are...

Banks

I keep on getting peer pressured into playing the flamingo game

But I'm not going to play anymore. Im putting my foot down

Interviewer: How much amount of milk does your cow produce?

Farmer: which one, black one or white one?

Interviewer: Black one

Farmer: 2 litres per day.

Interviewer: And the white one?

Farmer: 2 litres per day.

Interviewer : Where do they sleep?

Farmer: The Black one or the. White one?

Interviewer: The black on...

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