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Get Tire Jokes

If you run in front of a car you'll get tired...

But if you run behind the car you'll get exhausted

I will NEVER get tired of singing "Don't Speak"

I have No Doubt in my mind

Why don't cops get tired of beating people?

They have a chance for arrest afterward



Thank you, I'll see myself out

What does quartz get tired of?

Being taken for granite.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I get Tired.. I read this and laugh like hell. Must see if you are exhausted

I always look for a way to chill out after working for hours in front of my computer..and I never get bored reading the same lines I'm sharing here I smile each and every time..read,refresh and back to work!

Enjoy...



ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you ...

I never get tired of jokes about dyslexia even though I have it.

I wish I could read all of them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you do when you’re masturbating but get tired?

You take a masturbreak.

(I thought of this at like 4am last night and laughed out loud at myself and just really wanted to share)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once again this year, I’ve had requests for my Vodka Christmas Cake recipe so here goes. Please keep in your files as I am beginning to get tired of typing this up every year!

*(Made mine this morning!!)*

1 cup sugar,
1 tsp. baking powder,
1 cup water,
1 tsp. salt ,
1 cup brown sugar,
Lemon juice,
4 large eggs,
Nuts,
1 bottle Vodka,
2 cups dried fruit.

Sample a cup of Vodka to check qual...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two 70 year old men, Mike and Joe, have been friends all of their lives.

When it's clear that Joe is dying, Mike visits him every day.

One day Mike says, "Joe, we both loved football all our lives, and we played football on Saturdays together for so many years. Please do me one favour, when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's football there...

I work with a Chinese guy called Kim

One night we were at the bar having a drink and I asked “Do you ever get tired of westerners saying all Chinese people look the same?”

He replied: “Kim is at the bar getting the drinks. I’m his wife.”

A man walks up to a janitor and asks him, "Don't you ever get tired of cleaning."

The man, taken back, says, "Excuse me sir. I'll let you know I have children at Harvard, Yale, and MIT."

The other man replies, "Oh really? I'm sorry, what classes are they taking?"

The janitor replies, "Nah, they're janitors."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So, a priest goes to mechanic to get tires rotated on his car...

...as car is about to be lowered from the lift, priest ask his mechanic:


"Are those lugnuts tight enough?"


*"Tighter than nun's cunt, father"*


"You best give them another tug then, son""

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My neighbor's wife is better than mine!

I've always felt an irresistible attraction for the neighbour next door.

One day, when speaking to her husband, he said:
"I need to have my apartment painted, but I work all day and I get tired. I tried to hire a professional painter but the guy asked me for the an arm and a leg ..."
...

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