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Excercise Jokes

What's a rednecks favorite excercise?

Hick ups

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A parachutist is about to drop from a plane tommorow as part of a military excercise..

His mother calls him at midnight and with terror in her voice she says:
Do not go tommorow!! I saw a terrible dream, your parachute was not working and you were killed!! Please dont do it!!!
The soldier was terrified about his mothers dream but he still got into the plane. As the persons where...

I've developed a new method of excercise that strengthens your fetishes rather than your body.

It's good in concept, but I haven't worked out there kinks yet.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The next time you have your life, remember...

I have a friend who has sex 2-3 times a day, excercises twice a day, reads 2 books a week and yet complains about how much he hates prison.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Vaginal excersises...

Vaginal excercises are for pussies

Guy has a bad eye pain

Guy has a bad eye pain, he goes to the doctor and explains the strange pain he gets in his eye everytime he drinks coffe. Sometimes his left others times his right eye.

The doctor finds nothing worng, he suggests an excercise where he will have coffee and all the extras in his office , then ...

[LONG] The priest and the half lemon.

A priest was sent out to a rural village because the old priest has passed away. He meets the local people, they all get to know each other. His first mass goes well, but after the ceremony a slim man in poor clothing approaches the priest and says:

\- Excuse me father, be kind, and please gi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(Long Joke) Three men died, and arrived at the Pearly Gates for judgement...

3 men died and arrived at the Pearly Gates for judgement. St. Peter tells them that the rules have changed, and they can only be let in to heaven now, if they had a really bad death. He then proceeds to get their stories one at a time.

The first man explains. "I live on the 25th floor of my ...

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