UPJOKE
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George Michael Jokes

Did you hear about the Mexican George Michael tribute act?

He's called Carlos Whisper

What did George Michael and wellington boots have in common?

They both got sucked off in bogs.

What's the difference between George Michael and my wellies?

My wellies still get sucked off in bogs.

What do you get when you mix Dr. Seuss with George Michael?

Green Eggs and Wham!

Hopefully George Michael was an organ donor...

... so on his last Christmas he gave someone his heart

What side dish does George Michael ask for with his curry?

Well I guess it would be rice

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Darth Vader walks into his local record shop and asks for a copy of George Michael's debut solo album

The guy behind the counter says "I'm sorry, it's out of stock."

Darth Vader shakes his head and says "I find your lack of Faith disturbing..."

What's the only thing that could have saved George Michael?

A whambulance

George Michael once damaged his ears while cleaning them...

Careless Swissper

On the topic of George Michael...

I guess you could say it was his "Last Christmas".

Too soon?

The Police are looking into George Michaels' death.

When the press asked if an autopsy would be performed, the coroner was quoted as saying: "Well I guess it would be nice, if I could touch his body."

George Michael would make a pretty good Fremen.

Guilty feet have got no rhythm.

^^^^^Yes ^^^^^I ^^^^^am ^^^^^a ^^^^^complete ^^^^^nerd, ^^^^^stop ^^^^^looking ^^^^^at ^^^^^me ^^^^^like ^^^^^that.

What did George Michael say to his partner before he went to work?

Wake me up before you go-go

The opposite of George Strait...

is George Michaels

Why was Darth Vader upset when he heard George Michael will only play new songs at his concerts?

He found his lack of Faith disturbing.

What to watch on TV tonight

A few days ago, I was watching George Michael videos. A couple of days ago, it was a Star Wars marathon. Tonight? The Apprentice.

My Father died when I was 12 years old.

My dad died when I was 12, and was diagnosed with cancer several years before, so for the longest time, I never had a father figure.

And for some reason, George Michael won’t return or answer my fan mail or letters. But, I’m sure he’ll get back to me when he can.

Darth Vader...

Of all the things that Darth Vader lost when the Death Star blew up, it was the destruction of his George Michael box set that affected him most deeply.

He finds his lack of Faith disturbing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Celebrity Computer Viruses

Monica Lewinsky virus: Sucks all the memory out of your computer.

Ronald Reagan virus: Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.

Mike Tyson virus: Quits after one byte.

Oprah Winfrey virus: Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB.<...

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