UPJOKE
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A comforting word

A woman is sitting at her recently deceased husband's funeral. A man leans in to her and asks, "Do you mind if I say a word?"

"No, go right ahead," the woman replied.

The man stands, clears his throat, says "Plethora" and sits back down.

"Thanks," the woman said, "that means a l...
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This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

What do you say when you're comforting a grammar Nazi?

There, their, they're.

What's comforting and scary at the same time?

A warm toilet seat.
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Hearing that Jesus loves you is a very comforting thing

Unless youโ€™re in a Mexican prison
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I tried comforting the jilted bride by reminding her...

"At least the wedding went off without a hitch."
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It's comforting to know that the US government works the same way as a college student when it comes to deadlines...

They both wait until the last minute, then get an extension.
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