Classical Musician Jokes - 14 Hilarious Classical Musician Jokes

Did you hear about the book/movie about two terminally ill teenaged Indian classical musicians?

It's called 'The Fault In Our Sitars'.

(Came up with this a few months ago. You read it here first.)

Who was the most hated classical musician?

Nickelbach.

A rock musician, a classical musician and a jazz musician are sitting together, drinking...

Rock musician talks about his recent band tour,
- "and after all taxes were paid and such, I was able to afford a nice little yacht from the remaining money."
The classical musician smiles and says,
- "Well, kinda nice. My orchestra sold so many records though, I was even able to afford ...

A classical musician bought a Stradivari violin

Now he is quite Baroque.

Who is a chickens three favorite classical musicians?

Bach, Bach, Bach.

A movie studio is casting roles for a documentary about classical musicians.

Tom Cruise says “I’ll play the part of Mozart”
Liam Neeson says “I’ll make a great Beethoven”
Arnold Schwarzenegger says “I’ll be Bach”

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he was invited to a classical musician theme Halloween party?

I'll be Bach.

What did Arnold Schwartzenegger’s son say when auditioning for the play about classical musicians?

“I’ll be Bach”

What do you call two classical musicians ending their relationship?

They baroque up

I brought a classical musician back from the past to prove that my time-machine works, but I can't find him.

He must be Haydn.

I had to pay for everything when I went out with a couple classical musicians

they were completely baroque.

In the late 90s, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sly Stallone auditioned for a film about classical musicians.

The producers brought the two of them into their office to go over potential roles for them.

Before they could even get a word out, Stallone says “I wanna be that Amadeus guy.”

The producers exchange looks, nod and say, “You got it Sly.” They turn to Arnold, “And what about you.”
...

Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, and Dolph Lundgren were sitting around a a table

when they came up with the idea for a movie series based on the lives of classical musicians. They had all the details nailed down: the plot, the characters, the music, and so on. However, they couldn't decide which one of them was to play each classical composer in the film series. Eventually they ...

Some Arnie jokes

My wife has just left me for Arnold Schwarzenegger.

She'll be back.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 7.

He replied, "I still love Vista, baby".

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A movie production company desperately needs a new idea. They decide to ma...

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