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Balkan Jokes

A German in a Bar

A German walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender tells him : "20 euros!"

The German is shocked - "20 euros? yesterday it was only 3 euros !"

"Well, today it is 20 euros."

\- "But why 20, damn it?"

Bar tender : "I'll explain it,

\-3 euros is beer,...

What do you call a Balkan napkin?

A Serbiette.

A Serb, a Croat and a Bosniak are arrested in Iran for drinking alcohol.

The court sentences them to 10 whip lashes each, but everyone is allowed to make a special request beforehand.

First up is the Serb. "I request a pillow strapped on my back!" he says. After 2 lashes it rips apart and his back gets completely torn open.

Second up is the Croat. "I reques...

Have you heard of the Christian cult that thinks that the world started 6,000yrs ago in the Balkans?

Croatianists

Middle age

It's a stage in life in which an average Italian, Spaniard, Balkan person or Eastern European (and nowadays more and more frequently a westerner too), stops living with their parents, and their parents start instead living with them (often without changing actual location).

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

American, Russian and Serbian presidents argue about who has a more loyal and devout soldier

(Explanation for non-Balkan people: Serbs are known to be very stubborn, and sometimes refuse to do what you demand them to do or they do the opposite, just "because")



Biden says: "I'll show you the pride of the USA military. John, come here!"



A soldier arrives, salute...

A lawyer and a tree

There is an old joke, circulating around the Balkans, about a lawyer and a tree. The main case of the lawyer was the dispute between two neighbors about a tree placed at the common border of their properties. The case was going on for decades, the lawyer was mediating, but no solution came and event...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

God calls in an Albanian, a Grecian, and a Serbian for a quick reckoning.

God has realized that things aren't going so well in the general vicinity of the Balkans so he calls up an Albanian, a Grecian, and a Serbian to convince them to change their ways.
First he calls in the Grecian and says to them, "Your people have become so lazy in recent years! You're ruining e...

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