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Wei Jokes

I think I banged a Chinese celebrity

She kept screaming "I'm Wei Tu Yung" like I was supposed to know the name.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 construction workers. (Long)

There were three construction workers building a hotel. One of them was Wei, another was Daniel and the other was Marcel. During lunch breaks, thr three would go to the top of the hotel and eat their lunch. Wei unpacked his lunched and exclaimed "Sushi! My favorite!", before digging into his lunch. ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Jewish guy walks into a bar. The Chinese bartender asks him his name...

"I'm Max Goldberg", he says, "what's yours?"
"I'm Wei Zhang, it's nice to meet you."

Mr. Goldberg says, "I'll never forgive you people for bombing Pearl Harbor."
"I'm Chinese. That was the Japanese."
"Chinese, Japanese, all the same to me."

Mr. Zhang says, "I'll never forgive ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Few scientists were wondering on how well humans cope with hopeless stress

Scientists decide that sending 3 men to a deserted island for 5 years with no hope of rescue or assistance would be a good indicator.

The United States, France, and China each offer up 1 person for the study and they all get sent to their fate.

5 years later a helicopter lands on the i...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Have you ever had sex in a Chinese restaurant?

Its Wei Fun

They say one out of every 5 people on the planet is Chinese.

The thing is, there’s 5 people in my family. On of us must be Chinese.
I know it can’t be me. I’m pretty sure it’s not my mon or dad.
That leaves my brothers: Shawn, and Zhang Wei.

Whispers: *I think it’s Shawn...*

So I married way too young...

Oops, she spells it Wei Tu Yung

What do you call a man driving northbound on the southbound side of a Beijing highway?

Mr Wong Wei.

A Chinese mother with a terrible stutter

There once was a Chinese woman named Wei, and her family had decided to move to America ever since Wei was 14 years of age. Though this was hard for Wei because her language transition didn't go over so well. She could speak clearly, but she'd always find herself stuttering on the last word.

...

Do you know about the Chinese author who wrote a million page book?

It was Wei Tu Long.

My Chinese wife kicked me out because I wouldn't get off my Chinese phone.

She said it's Mai Wei or the Huawei.

My Chinese son was born earlier than he was supposed to be born

We called him Wei Tu Sun

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