UPJOKE
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A little joke from my family's dinner table.

My family was talking a few weeks ago, and somehow I brought up the fact that every state in New England has a town or city in it called "Warren". I said that there's a Warren, Vermont, a Warren, Maine, a Warren, Rhode Island.

And my brother chimed in "There's also a Warren Ukraine!"

...

What do you call a man with 15 rabbits up his bum?

Warren.

Did you hear Elizabeth Warren cancelled her campaign?

It wasn't the first race she has had to leave.

Elizabeth Warren says... only the Government should have guns.

A real Indian would know better.

What is Elizabeth Warren's spirit animal?

A Pander Bear

Why is Elizabeth Warren really running for president?

She will finally get to be called Chief.

A true story from Warren Buffett

One day Mr. Buffett invited a jeweler over to show some jewels to his other friends during a vacation, but was worried about the security of the hotel.

“See that safe?” the jeweler said. “This afternoon we changed the combination and now even the hotel management doesn’t know what it is.” War...

Warren Gatland and Eddie Jones are both killed when a lightning bolt hits the Millennium Stadium.

In heaven, they are greeted by God and Eddie is taken to his new home, a lovely English country cottage with statues of English rugby greats and angels singing Jerusalem and Swing Low, Sweet Chariot.

He was delighted until he suddenly heard some even more beautiful singing coming from the top...

Correct answer

The renowned logician, S. F. X. Van Dusen, was walking home through the warren of streets that was late-Victorian Boston when he was accosted by a stranger.

"Can you tell me how to get to the First Presbyterian Church?" he asked.

"Yes," replied the scientist, smiling benevolently, and ...

Warren Buffett once said “If you don't find a way to make money while you sleep, you will work until you die.”

and that's why I got into prostitution

I have a friend who's a genius.

He could always tell just by looking at your car/phone/computer how long until your device starts acting up. His name's Warren. Warren T.

The secret of long life

German billionaire Karl Albrecht used to play golf a lot. In fact, he had a private golf club, because he was a huge fan of the sport. He lived 94 years.

American investor Kirk Kerkorian also loved sports. In his eighties, he was rated top 3 tennis player of the country in his age. He lived 9...

What are Hillary Clinton, Elizabeth Warren, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and Theresa May doing in a room together?

...playing bridge.

Why can't you bury a man living east of the Mississippi in a graveyard west of the Mississippi?

He's still alive.




(Learned from my 6th grade math teacher Mr. Warren)

I hate it when everyone tells me to read an author's works, but then I can't find it anhwhere.

For someone so famous, nobody seems to keep Warren Piece in stock.

What do you call an all you can eat meal in a rabbit hole?

A Warren Buffet

Joe Biden formally announcing his run for president

Bernie Sanders: I am running

Andrew Yang: I am running

Kamala Harris: I am running

Elizabeth Warren: I am running

Joe Biden: Me too

Donald Trump is the most unifying voice in American politics.

When was the last time Barack Obama, Paul Ryan, Jon Stewart, Glenn Beck, Bernie Sanders, George Bush, Elizabeth Warren, Mitt Romney, Bill Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Al Gore, John McCain, and Hillary Clinton all agreed on anything?

If I had a dollar for every person complaining about reposts in this sub

Warren Buffet would look up to me

One day, Johnny comes home from school and asks his mother, "Mommy, how was I born?"

"The stork brought you here," says the mother.

"And how were my brother Joel and my sister Emily born?"

"The stork brought them, too."

"And how were you born?"

"The stork also brought me."

"Did the stork also bring Uncle George and Aunt Ruth and Cousin Evan and Cou...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Private Snafu joins the army.

Always last in line for mess, roll or runs, he was also last in line when they passed out equipment. When he gets to the guy handing out guns, the box is empty.
"What the hell am I supposed to do without a gun?!" Snafu asks.
The warren officer thinks for a second. Picking up a mop, he begins ...

A Pair of Rabbits

A wild rabbit was caught and taken to a National Institute of Health laboratory. When he arrived, he was befriended by a rabbit that had been born and raised in the lab.

One evening the wild rabbit noticed that his cage hadn't been properly closed and decided to make a break for freedom. He i...

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