Warren buffet says buy stocks that you understand.

I bought Budweiser and Marlboro stocks .

I hate it when everyone tells me to read an author's works, but then I can't find it anhwhere.

For someone so famous, nobody seems to keep Warren Piece in stock.

Did you hear Elizabeth Warren cancelled her campaign?

It wasn't the first race she has had to leave.

Elizabeth Warren says... only the Government should have guns.

A real Indian would know better.

One day, Johnny comes home from school and asks his mother, "Mommy, how was I born?"

"The stork brought you here," says the mother.

"And how were my brother Joel and my sister Emily born?"

"The stork brought them, too."

"And how were you born?"

"The stork also brought me."

"Did the stork also bring Uncle George and Aunt Ruth and Cousin Evan and Cou...

Warren Gatland and Eddie Jones are both killed when a lightning bolt hits the Millennium Stadium.

In heaven, they are greeted by God and Eddie is taken to his new home, a lovely English country cottage with statues of English rugby greats and angels singing Jerusalem and Swing Low, Sweet Chariot.

He was delighted until he suddenly heard some even more beautiful singing coming from the top...

Warren Buffett once said “If you don't find a way to make money while you sleep, you will work until you die.”

and that's why I got into prostitution

What do you call a guy with 5 rabbits in his ass?

Warren.

What is Elizabeth Warren's spirit animal?

A Pander Bear

A true story from Warren Buffett

One day Mr. Buffett invited a jeweler over to show some jewels to his other friends during a vacation, but was worried about the security of the hotel.

“See that safe?” the jeweler said. “This afternoon we changed the combination and now even the hotel management doesn’t know what it is.” War...

What are Hillary Clinton, Elizabeth Warren, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and Theresa May doing in a room together?

...playing bridge.

50 years ago, Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway starred in "Bonnie and Clyde"

Tonight they got together to attempt one last heist

What do you call an all you can eat meal in a rabbit hole?

A Warren Buffet

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Each 2020 hopeful Presidential candidate was asked to reveal their private reddit account to prove their values.

Bernie Sanders was insisting that the top 1% of reddit had way too many coins and wanted to force them to share gold more often.

Pete Buttigieg basically followed all of Bernie's posts and talked trash.

Joe Biden was just crossposting old posts of Obama's and saying how awesome they we...

Why can't you bury a man living east of the Mississippi in a graveyard west of the Mississippi?

He's still alive.




(Learned from my 6th grade math teacher Mr. Warren)

A Pair of Rabbits

A wild rabbit was caught and taken to a National Institute of Health laboratory. When he arrived, he was befriended by a rabbit that had been born and raised in the lab.

One evening the wild rabbit noticed that his cage hadn't been properly closed and decided to make a break for freedom. He i...

Joe Biden formally announcing his run for president

Bernie Sanders: I am running

Andrew Yang: I am running

Kamala Harris: I am running

Elizabeth Warren: I am running

Joe Biden: Me too

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A rich man is looking to start a new hobby.

He heard that Warhammer 40k is a fun pastime so he decided to pay a visit to the local GW store.

"So what exactly do I need to start this hobby?" He asked.

"Well," the manager replied calmly."You will need to sell your kidneys, half of your liver and one of your lungs. I know a doctor ...

Donald Trump is the most unifying voice in American politics.

When was the last time Barack Obama, Paul Ryan, Jon Stewart, Glenn Beck, Bernie Sanders, George Bush, Elizabeth Warren, Mitt Romney, Bill Clinton, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Al Gore, John McCain, and Hillary Clinton all agreed on anything?

If I had a dollar for every person complaining about reposts in this sub

Warren Buffet would look up to me

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Private Snafu joins the army.

Always last in line for mess, roll or runs, he was also last in line when they passed out equipment. When he gets to the guy handing out guns, the box is empty.
"What the hell am I supposed to do without a gun?!" Snafu asks.
The warren officer thinks for a second. Picking up a mop, he begins ...

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