A theological one for the computer scientists

After the animals exited the ark, the Lord came to the animals and the Lord spoke "Go forth and multiply".

The snakes came to him and said "Oh Lord, we cannot fulfil the commandment, for we are adders"

Thus spoke the Lord "Go and cut down the trees, and out of the trees you shall fashi...

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I was talking to my uncle about his high school years…

He said when he started high school he was the biggest trouble maker in the school. He cut classes, got in fights, smoked in the bathroom, etc etc. Said he spent half his freshmen year sitting outside the principal’s office.

Eventually he got expelled and his parents had no choice but to sen...

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Theological debate

One day, the Pope decided he'd ban all Jews from the Vatican. The Jews understandibly got really angry about this, so the Pope proclaimed that if a Jew could manage to beat him in a theological debate, they could stay.

The Jews chose their wisest rabbi for the religious debate against the Pop...

What do you get when you win a theological debate with a muslim?

Death threats.

I believe the theological philosopher Thomas Aquinas was rather overweight......

I guess this makes him an early deep fat friar

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Rabbi Eliezer was the most brilliant Rabbi of all time...

Nevertheless, his fellow Rabbis would often disagree with his opinions, leading to lengthy philosophical and theological debates.

During one debate on the subject of the legal minutiae of a religious ritual he found himself at odds with three of his colleagues. While everyone recognized that ...

Holmes and Watson are on a camping trip.

In the middle of the night, Holmes wakes up and gives Watson a nudge. "Watson," he says, "look up in the sky and tell me what you see."

"I see millions of stars, Holmes," says Watson.

"And what do you conclude from that, Watson?"

Watson thinks for a moment. "Well," he says, "a...

A priest sees God

After being initially overwhelmed, the priest tries to talk to God to finally resolve some theological and philosophical conundrums:
He asks God: Almighty, how do you experience physical space?
God strokes his beard and says: physical space means nothing to me, billions of your miles are but a...

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, the fire dwindling nearby, Holmes said: "Watson, look up and tell me what you see".

Watson said "I see a fantastic panorama of countless of stars".

Holmes: "And what does that tell you?"

Watso...

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The Rabbi and the Cardinal

A large number of Jewish immigrants have moved into a pastoral Italian town. The locals, fearful that resources won't be able to accommodate this influx of people, complain to their local cardinal who agrees to settle the matter. He accepts a challenge to a theological debate with the wisest of th...

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