The kids saw a hot-dog stand

They went near it and their stomach already started to rumble. There was not a single penny in their pockets. The boy said, "What are we gonna do?", which the girl replied," Lets just take a quick smell". And they both took a deep breath

Suddenly the vendor emerged and shouted at the kids, "W...

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Some people are just like Muppets.

They'll suddenly become full of life if you stick your arm up their butts and shake it.

How many lawyers do you need to change a lightbulb?

Three.

One to climb the ladder, another one to shake it, and a third one to sue the manufacturer of the ladder.

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Woman visits the antique store

And find a beautiful wardrobe. She decide to buy, but says, that it is too big and won't fit through her door.

The clerk tells her that they can disassemble it, deliver to her house and then assemble it again. She accept so they do just that.

Next day woman calls to the store explainin...

Do you know why women fart after they pee?

They can't shake it so they need to blow dry.

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The Tale of Kevin Bopper

Back in high school there was this kid named Kevin Bopper. He was... strange, to say the least. He was that quiet kid with long, greasy, dandruff-ridden hair, a face full of acne, and wore a leather jacket- you know the type. The thing that made him stand out, however, was his weird fixation on traf...

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I found this bell..

It doesn't even ring when I shake it and it's heavy for no fucking reason. What a dumb bell...

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Old Russian joke: One day the bear escaped from the zoo

One day the bear escaped from the zoo and climbed a tree in a residential area. Same day lonely old lady came out in the morning for milk, saw the bear and called the zoo. Half an hour later a rusty old van drove to her house. Hefty bearded man with a shotgun got out of the van followed by little wh...

The circus arrives in town with a novel act - make the bull elephant kneel down and win $1000.

After watching various people trying everything Jimmy steps up to the elephant and gives it a mighty kick in the balls. The elephant collapses and its owner, cursing Jimmy's foul methods, hands over the cash.

The circus moves on to the next town and Jimmy, recognising a good opportunity, foll...

Once upon a time there was a girl,

this girl had the ability to heal others any other living thing imaginable. One day a very injured demon came into her door and out of the kindness of her heart she healed him. The demon rose up and thanked her while he girl outstretched her hand to shake it, as was customary. But alas the demon fle...

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A man goes gorilla hunting with a hunter friend

They leave in the morning with handcuffs, a dog and a rifle.

Upon arriving to a tree where a gorilla is perched, the hunter tells his friend his technique: "I will go up that tree and shake it so hard the gorilla will fall. As soon as he hits the ground, the dog will bite him at the balls and...

Ant - the hero.

Ant asks giraffe: Can I f...k you?

Giraffe though: what the hell, he's small I even can't feel it. Here you are, my boy.

After a few minutes, she put her long neck into high voltage cables lifted high over the ground.

Ant start to screem: Shake it, baby, yeahhhh!!!

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