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Shimmy Jokes

Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there’s a long break in the ledge they can’t cross...

“Something for this I have.” Yoda says. He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape.

He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.

When they get back to Yoda’s hovel, th...

A lime and fresh mint are being muddled in a glass

when the lime says to the mint "Im freezing we need to melt this ice!" The mint agreed so they shimmy the glass over to a ray of sunlight and the lime says "Do you think this is enough light to melt the ice?" And the mint says "Not bad." We need "Mo heat though."

I was walking past a prison the other day, and

I saw a dwarf in an orange jumpsuit shimmying down the side of the building.

I thought to myself, “now that’s a little con descending.”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two college bros decide to go on safari

They grab their gear and walk off into the distance. They come to a river and must swim across it.
They come to a cliff and must shimmy down it.
They come to a ravine and must climb up it.
They come to a rock wall and must rappel down it.
They come to the jungle and start the trek th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two women are sitting at a roadside cafe when a muscle car roars by.

"Looks like someone's compensating for something," the first woman says.

"What do you mean?" her friend asks.

"Well, you know what they say," she replies. "A guy with a big car is making up for his other... shortcomings."

The second woman looks puzzled, and says, "You mean sex? ...

What do you call it when Steve Buscemi dances?

A Steve Bu-shimmy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Husband and Wife go to a disco

There is a man dancing the night away, moonwalking, cartwheeling, shimmying and shaking.

The wife turns to her husband, "40 years ago I could have married him,"

Husband, quick as a whip, responds "Looks like the fucker is still celebrating"

A German, an Italian and a Chinese man arrive at a logging camp up north looking for work.

The boss sees the strapping young German and says, "you look strong and fit, here's a chainsaw, go join the fellers and help cut down some trees."
Next he looks at the Italian, a bit of a belly on him and looking well fed, and says, "You look like you know your way around the kitchen, go help in ...

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