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If the Nazis had won WWII and set up the Thousand Year Reich, what would they have called their leader?

*The Kaiser Permanente*

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A Jew is riding in a streetcar in Germany during the early days of the Third Reich.

He is reading reading a Nazi newspaper, the Volkische Beobachter. A non-Jewish acquaintance sits down next to him and says, "Why on earth are you reading that garbage? It’s so virulently anti-Semitic!” “Look, friend," says the Jew, "I get up early and work hard in a factory all day. When I get home,...

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Did you know that Hitler was in dire need of a pedicure while he was leader of the third reich?

He was a toe-talon-aryan

What do you call a blind Third Reich member?

A Not-see

The soviet soldier asked the german how to get to Berlin

Soviet soldier:how do i go to Berlin ?
German: two hundred meters later take the third Reich.

(it was my first english joke ever probably it gonna be the last one sorry for my broken english)

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I have a highly collectible wristwatch from the Third Reich...

It's a Swatch-ticker

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The third Reich

Why was Hitler’s Thousand Year Reich going to be the last one?

Because everyone knows three Reichs and your out.

What's the difference between Biggie Smalls and Charlie Chaplin?

One rocked the mic and the other mocked the Reich.

I was talking to a girl about the establishment of the 4th Reich when a girl told me that I was being politically incorrect

Apparently the proper term is "European Union"

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What happens when a furry takes over nazi germany?

The Furred reich

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What did Hitlers psychiatrist say about him?

There's something not reich with him.

I'll take this down if people want me to. I don't know where else to post this, so I figured here is ok. How do you get to Germany?

You go straight down the road and take the 3rd Reich.

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I set up an internet page for Chinese Nazis.

So far it's got 3 Reichs on Facebook.

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What's one reason you should not join the Nazi party?

It is just nazi reich thing to do! ^^^^Also, ^^^^fuck ^^^^nazis

Germany is a pretty weird country. If you deny the Holocaust, you go to jail.

But if you organize one, you are promoted to Reich Chancellor.

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Why did the NAZI fail drivers ED?

He succeeded on two left turns but failed on the third reich

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Hitler is chairing a Nazi economic meeting.

The Reich’s Commerce Minister is delivering a tremendously boring report on minerals, and Hitler is about to nod off. “We are mining too many ores that are useless to the war effort. We need to mine less,” the minister says.

The Reich’s Chief Engineer, who is a stickler for grammar, is irrita...

It took awhile, but Germany has finally emerged as a leading democratic world power.

Clearly they understood that it takes three Reich turns to make a left.

Two rights don't make a wrong...

The third Reich makes it wrong.

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Why was Hitler late for work?

He tried driving a new route to work, but instead of taking the second left, he took the third reich.

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What position would Hitler play in Hockey?

Reich Wing

Macron said the rebuild of Notre Dame will take 2 Years and he will get the Germans to do it

Because they finished a thousand year Reich in just twelve years.

An Austrian, an Artist, and a Fascist walk into a bar

It went all Reich

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What did the umpire say to Hitler when he failed at baseball?

THREE REICHS, YOURE OUT!

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I posted an Asian Neo-Nazi post on facebook.

It's already got 50 reichs

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When did coach Hitler bench a player?

After the third st-reich.

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So I'm trying to start a new Nazi group...

But it's hard to get people to leave the already established groups, they’re built up, they have community there, then I have it. Weed. We’re going to be the weed Nazis, I get a sponsorship from a local skinhead dispensary, I set up a space, but there’s one problem, I only have 2 water pipes, for t...

Did you hear about the Chinese brother's that tried to start a German Empire?

Turns out two Wongs don't make a Reich.

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What did Hitler say to the driver when he got lost trying to invade France?

"take the third Reich"

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Why was Hitler bad at giving instructions?

Because three Reichs don't make a left

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Why was Hitler Destined to fail?

*3 Reichs and you're out*

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I setup a Facebook group for Chinese Nazi's.

So far it's got three Reich's.

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A college student is going to Europe for spring break

He asks his grandfather for some advice, which he happily provides.

"Kid, you gotta go over there and really get rowdy. Fuck any girl you meet, beat the shit out of anyone that gives you the side eye, get your buddies and really tear the town up. You're only young once, and those bastards don...

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How does one pass a Nazi test?

By giving all the Reich answers.

Why did Germany lose WW2?

Three Reichs and you're out

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Hitler is speaking to his advisers...

He was surrounded by all of the lead managers and advisers of his entire Reich. His main adviser told him how amazing and efficient Germany was.

"All of ze industries are over performing and creating enough resources for ze new world. Except perhaps ze mining industry, sir. Zey are performin...

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Ever hear the one about the Nazi hipster?

He sort of preferred the second Reich.

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How do you get to the Nazi parade ?

First you take the 4th left and then you take the Third Reich.

Germany can't start the next world war,

because three Reich's and you're out.

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What was Hitler's favorite breakfast cereal?

Reich Crispies.

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Hitler wasn't EVIL...

...In his mind, he was doing it for all the Reich reasons.

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Where is Hitler's bathroom?

Down ze hall on ze Third Reich!

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Never ask a Nazi for directions

They'll always say the Third Reich is the best way to go

Two wrongs don't make a right.

But three reichs definitely make a wrong.

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What does hitler say when he kills someone in call of duty?

Get reiched!

What will the Sith call the earth when they invade and take command?

The Force Reich

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The other day, I found out my navigation system is a Nazi.

It said, "In 1,000 feet, make the Third Reich."

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Did you hear about the scarf that Eva Braun knitted for Hitler?

He said it was kampfy and that he reiched it a lot, but that it could have used fuhrer stitches.

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What do you call Hitler's bachelor party?

The Reich-stag!

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What's the difference between someone who doesn't use their turn signal and Hitler?

You know Hitler will turn Reich.

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Apparently nazis have a skewed knowledge of world history

Ask any of them how ww2 went and they say it was all reich.

What do you call a German empire with lots of hair?

The Furred Reich

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Hitler's dad wrote a sitcom after the war....

He called it "3rd Reich from the Son"

Why did the German cross the road?

To get to the Reich side

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What did the Nazi boy say to his sweetheart?

I reich you.

Someone asked me where the Angel of Death is

"Go down the hall, Third door on your Reich"

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What's Hitler's favorite music genre?

Reich and Roll

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An old WWII veteran was speaking with his grandson

and extolling the virtues of being reckless and enjoying life while young.
"When I was your age, I went to Paris with some lads and we had a great time! We had our way with any French women we wanted, pissed on the Eifel tower, and beat the shit out of every Frog that crossed our paths! You have...

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During WWII, An Old Man Worked At a Concentration Camp in Poland...

Due to the Nazi's bombing the factory he used to work in. His job was to move straw back and forth, he would take new straw bales shipped in every morning, put the hay in wheelbarrows where prisoners would then bring the wheelbarrows to where it was needed.

Every night, he had to bring the o...

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