Poverty Jokes - 42 Hilarious Poverty Jokes

[Motivation] Just because you were born in poverty, it doesn't mean that you'll be poor forever.

I was born in a hospital, yet I'm not a doctor.

What are the worst three states to live?

State of Despair. / State of Confusion. / State of Poverty.

A man wants to deposit money at a Swiss bank.

"How much do you want to deposit?" asks the bank employee.

Whispers the man, "Three million."

"You can speak up," says the bank clerk. "In Switzerland, poverty is not a disgrace."

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What does anal sex and poverty have in common?

It makes you appreciate the little things.

How do you solve world hunger and poverty simultaneously?

By feeding the poor to the hungry.

A young couple in poverty give birth to identical twins.

After much consideration they decide that the best thing for the baby boys would be to give them up for adoption so that they can have a better shot in life. One boy goes to a Spanish family who name him Juan, the second goes to an Indian family who name him Amal.

18 years pass when the birth...

My friend made it his life’s mission to fight poverty.

He wrestles homeless people every weekend.

I do whatever I can to fight poverty

So the other day, I punched a tramp

(Courtesy of Milton Jones)

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Poor Irish Family

A poor Irish family lives on a farm and they rely on their single cow for income.

One morning, the father walks outside to find their cow dead.

"There is nothing that could help get us out of poverty now," says the dad as he shoots himself.

The mom walks outside and sees the dad...

I think my ex girlfriend fell into poverty since we broke up.

Every time I call her, she says, “Please leave me a loan.”

What's common between wife and poverty ?

Both goes away after becoming billionare .

Horrors of poverty

I've been around, you know. I've seen some of the poorest slums where children are starving and disease is rampant. Let me tell you, you've not seen anything, *anything* like it, until you've seen it in high-definition plasma!

Money can't buy you happiness

But poverty can't buy you anything.

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A Jewish man on the subway is reading an Arab newspaper

A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached him. "Moshe, have you lost your mind? Why are you reading an Arab newspaper?" Moshe replied, "I used to read the Jewish newspaper, but what did I find? Jews being persecuted,...

I've been living with extreme poverty and disfigurement for over 40 years, but today, God finally answered my prayers!

He said no.

There’s a fine line between poverty and stupidity

And Trump wants to build a wall on it

What bank do monks and nuns save with?

“Chaste bank”

(Yes I know, vow of poverty, but this way the joke works)

In theory if rich countries sent poor countries enough boostraps, they could pull themselves out of poverty

By selling them

I'm addicted to poverty

If my bank account has money in it I suffer withdrawal.

Poverty and Chastity

In January I spent a couple of days at a Benedictine monastery in California. It was a gorgeous place, with a courtyard garden full of fragrant orange trees and a retreat house full of antiques. When I first came through the door, one of the brothers glided up to me and said, "I know what you're thi...

Alfred Nobel lived in poverty but soon turned around his fortune and became one of the richest people in world in just a decade ......

Quite an explosive growth I've to say

I recently flew to Africa to do some charity work.

It was an eye-opening, shocking experience.
The poverty, the starvation, the fighting.... the *smell*, the noise....

I am never flying economy again.

An American walks into a swiss bank with two large bags

He walks up to a teller and says quietly "I have 2 million dollars in cash that I need to deposit into a swiss bank account now"

The teller replies "Sir, there's no need to whisper, poverty is nothing to be ashamed of in Switzerland."

The Canadian government spends more time and money taking care of other countries than its own people in poverty

You may think I’m wrong but it’s Trudeau

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An elderly Jewish man is sitting on a park bench reading the Tehran Times

A friend sees him and says, "Oy, Moishe! How can you read that rag? Don't you know the things they say about us?"

To which the man replies, "Well, I used to read to read the Jewish papers, but they're so depressing. Every headline is 'Jews Being Persecuted!' 'Jews Living in Poverty!' 'Jews Be...

What is the difference between poverty and my ex-wife?

Poverty sucks.

A man dies and goes to heaven…

St. Pete says “Welcome to heaven. Any questions?”

The man says “Yes. God is supposed to be all knowing, all powerful, and benevolent. Frankly, most people are miserable. There is war, disease, poverty, environmental disaster, genocide, all that. What’s going on?”

St. Pete turn...

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Three fathers are discussing their son's success.

The first one says "My son started off with very little money, but he is a genius in the stock markets, and became rich just like that! Recently he even bought a friend of his a new Ferrari."

The second one says "That's nothing! My boy started working as a cleaner in a large company, and over...

Mr Trump was invited to visit a poor African country.

A soccer match was arranged between two local teams in honour of Trump's visit. During the match, the Prime Minister of the country explained about the poverty his country was facing. Trump listened intently and said

"Mr PM, I've seen enough and I fully understand the extent of the poverty yo...

There's a banquet filled with Catholic Bishops

There's a banquet filled with Catholic Bishops. One of the waiters goes up to the Bishop and asks him how to become a Priest.

The Bishop tells him about the vows of poverty.

The waiter says 'if this is your idea of poverty I'd love to see your idea of chastity. :

What does a Ferrari and poverty have in common?

Princess Diana can't stop either

A lesson from my life as a monk

I learned a lot during my years at the monastery. One thing I still remember is that our vow of poverty meant that we were expected to go to great lengths to look after our one robe, including mending and from time to time dying them to their regulation dark hue.

One thing that surprised me ...

If you mix taco bell sauce into your ramen..

It tastes exactly like poverty.

It's interesting how different parts of the country have different ways of saying the same thing.

For instance, in most parts of the country, having an income of $100k or more is called "making six figures".

However, here in San Francisco, we call that same thing "living above the poverty line".

So there's this barber in a small town...

So there's this barber in a small town. One day he's sitting in his barbershop and a man walks in wearing a pair of sandals, and a long brown robe with a hood. The man sits down in the barber's chair. "Excuse me," says the barber. "I was wondering: why are you dressed like that?"
"Well," says th...

A man creates the smartest AI and presents it to the UN, boasting it can solve any problem

“Oh yeah?” Said the president of the United States. “Ok how do we solve poverty?”

“Calculating” said the AI, moments later printing out a sheet of paper for the UN to read.

Leaders from all over the world applied the proposals on the paper and in a month everyone starts living a bett...

What's an African's favourite type of tea?

Poverty.

You know Singapore?

With all that damn poverty it's like Multipore

The presidents of Serbia, Mexico and the United States were each granted the ability to ask God one question...

The Serbian president first went up to God , and asked, "Father, when will my country finally be rid of poverty and corruption?

God paused, and then answered, "In 300 years, my son."

The Serbian president began to weep, "I won't live to see that day!"

Next the Mexican president ...

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The Golden Toilet

A guy was invited to this lush party by his boss, a very wealthy man. He is very excited as he was born an raised poor and in poverty and had never been to a formal party before. He borrows a tux from a friend and heads to the party. The booze was flowing free of charge so the guy has more than h...

You’ve hit rock bottom.

After being let go from your job at the thread factory, you’re struggling to make ends meet. You can’t afford to pay rent. You’ve been evicted. Desperately searching for an apartment, you finally find one that meets your budget. Upon reading the ad, you notice it says “tenants with more than 4 legs ...

How to make the world a better place.

How do you raise the literacy rate while simultaneously lowering the poverty ratio of a town near you?

All you have to do is drive as fast as possible through the Walmart parking lot.

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