I meant to download a calendar app for my phone, by my eyesight is so bad I downloaded a colander app... now my battery just keeps draining.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
My roommate was going out on a blind date so I told her about this phone app for her own safety.
I said: "It's called *Mum! Are you OK?* and what is does is, it puts a button on your display which you can press and then a couple of minutes later your phone will ring and the display will say MUM. So if you get there and your date looks a bit creepy you just touch the button, put your phone away,...
Girlfriends are like phone apps
They come with in-app purchases, and need the reassurance of updates to function well.
A woman, tired of being alone, posts a personal ad
In the ad, she says she's looking for a man who won't beat her, won't walk out on her, and can please her in bed.
A few days later, her doorbell rings. She opens the door and is surprised to find a man on her doorstep with no arms or legs. "I'm here about the personal ad," the man says casual...
Someone should make a phone app that connects to your bank account and only lists restaurant you can afford
Could call it Welp
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