Pavlov Jokes

He conditioned it.

She said it rang a bell but wasn't sure if it was there or not.

So I headed on down to the library to see if they had a copy for my 10 year old daughter.

The librarian said that my description rang a bell but she wasn’t sure if it was there or not.

...when another patron walks in and a bell on the door rings. Pavlov stands up, says, "I forgot to feed the dogs," and leaves.

The students were laughing at the stupidity of the dogs.

Then the bell rang and they all got up and rushed to the canteen for lunch.

An MIT student spent an entire summer going to the Harvard football field every day wearing a black and white striped shirt, walking up and down the field for ten or fifteen minutes throwing birdseed all over the field, blowing a whistle and then walking off the field. At the end of the summer, it ... read more

The librarian says "That rings a bell, but I'm not sure if it's there or not".

Pavlov: I've conditioned a dog to drool when it hears a bell. By ringing a bell before giving it food, it associates the bell with food and starts drooling when it hears it now.
Colleague: Hah, dogs are dumb. How many times did you run this test?
Pavlov: 69 times.
Colleague: Nice!

Classical conditioning

Doesn't ring a bell.

Finding the counter deserted, he rings the little bell these kinds of places tend to have.

When someone finally comes around, they find Pavlov lost in thought and ask him what's wrong, to which he says: "I forgot to feed the dog."

The cats a maybe and the dog said it didn't ring any bells.

Conditioner

It's called "The Salivation Army"

Just a classical conditioner.

(I hope the name rings a bell)

At that moment, bar phone rang loudly and Pavlov started worrying. Barman got curious and asked: "Sir, what's the problem?"
Pavlov stood up and shouted:"God damn it. I forgot to feed the dogs."

Air Conditioning

for Air Conditioning

Winning the No-bell prize.

He used conditioner on them.

Please knock. DON’T ring the bell.

After we finished the pop quiz in our psychology class, our teacher allowed us to quietly talk amongst ourselves. A group of us were discussing the idiocy of Pavlov's dog and how pairing a stimulus with a conditioned response seemed illogical in the real world. Then the bell rang, and we all headed ... read more

Repeated conditioning.

...and orders a breakfast. "Sure," the lady says. "I'll let you know when it's ready." After a little while, she places his tray on the counter and rings the bell. Pavlov leaps up and exclaims, "Oh my gosh, I have to feed the dogs!"

They tried to hire Pavlov’s dog but built a Hippo-campus

I always laugh at them without even thinking about it!

Donate them to the salivation army
^^I'llseemyselfout

Isaac Newton: "I'll drop in."

Socrates: "I'll think about it."

Charles Darwin: "I'll wait to see what evolves."

Marie Curie: "I am radiating enthusiasm."

Ivan Pavlov: "I'm positively drooling at the thought."

Albert Einstein: "It will ... read more

One day I was looking for creative task avoidance tactics, so I asked Siri to tell me a joke. Here are some of the best she had:

1. Whiteboards are quite remarkable.

2. Pavlov’s hair wasn’t always so silky. He had to condition it.

3. Did you hear about the band called 1023MB? Th... read more

I heard that there is a new novel out about Schrodinger's cat and Pavlov's dog going on an adventure but I couldn't remember the name. Sounded good so I decided to go down to the library to see if they've got it. Looked around and couldn't see it so I asked the librarian if they have it in, she repl... read more

"Day 19 of the experiment, I have successfully conditioned my master to give me food,smile,and write in his book every time I drool." - Pavlov's Dog

...at this point just *hearing* the name "Pavlov" makes me mad.

The ultimate Pavlovian twist is that whenever you hear the name Pavlov you think of a dog

For Halloween, you should dress up as Pavlov. Not everyone will get it, but it should ring a bell.

* I’m reading a great book on anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.

* I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.

* Why can’t atheists solve exponential equations? Because they don’t believe in higher powers.

* Schrodinger’s cat walks into a bar. And ... read more

One day, a Russian military unit receives news that Pvt. Pavlov's parents had died. The unit decides to break the news to Pavlov as delicately as possible.

The next day, the officer of the unit rounds up the men and then says: "All who have parents, step forward! ...Pvt. Pavlov, where are you... read more