What do you call a metronome that recently broke?

Tempo-rary.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a chronic masturbator and a metronome?

One is a beat meter and the other is a meat beater.

Why do mathematicians like metronomes?

Because they're a rhythmic tic.

Did you hear about the musician who had to replace his broken metronome?

It was because he couldn't count on it anymore.

I bought a metronome recently, I left it in my car as I stopped at the bank machine for a minute, came back and it was gone, someone stole it but was caught...

...now I hear the thief is doing 2/4

I met an urban dwarf who keeps perfect time.

He’s a metronome.

What do you call a gnome who dresses nice?

A metronome!

People tell me my humour is offbeat

but they get weirded out if you walk around with a metronome.

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