UPJOKE
pendulumrubatoclockworkpulsetempoamsterdampulsingsynthesizerpolyrhythmclick trackcomposerscomposeral-andalusescapementperformer

Metronome Jokes

What did the clock say to the metronome after his stand-up routine?

The jokes need some work, but your timing is impeccable

What do you call a metronome that recently broke?

Tempo-rary.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between a chronic masturbator and a metronome?

One is a beat meter and the other is a meat beater.

Why do mathematicians like metronomes?

Because they're a rhythmic tic.

What do they call a Gnome who lives in a city?

A metronome.

People tell me my humour is offbeat

but they get weirded out if you walk around with a metronome.

I bought a metronome recently, I left it in my car as I stopped at the bank machine for a minute, came back and it was gone, someone stole it but was caught...

...now I hear the thief is doing 2/4

I met an urban dwarf who keeps perfect time.

He’s a metronome.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.