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Metronome Jokes

What did the clock say to the metronome after his stand-up routine?

The jokes need some work, but your timing is impeccable

What do you call a metronome that recently broke?

Tempo-rary.

Why do mathematicians like metronomes?

Because they're a rhythmic tic.

What do they call a Gnome who lives in a city?

A metronome.

People tell me my humour is offbeat

but they get weirded out if you walk around with a metronome.

I bought a metronome recently, I left it in my car as I stopped at the bank machine for a minute, came back and it was gone, someone stole it but was caught...

...now I hear the thief is doing 2/4

I met an urban dwarf who keeps perfect time.

He’s a metronome.
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