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Oldtimer Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Japanese government delegation visits Russia [USSR for oldtimers]

Russian officials give them tours around Moscow and show off the best they could to impress honorable guests. Whenever they ask guests how they like the streets, buildings, or "state-of-the-art" plants, guests give the same feedback smile, bow, and "You have wonderful children".

On the final ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old timer sitting on his porch and saw a kid pass by carrying a duck tape

Old timer sitting on his porch and saw a kid pass by carrying a duct tape. Old timer asked the kid "hey son what are you going to do with that duct tape?" The boy said " im going to catch some ducks with it". Old timer said " you cant catch ducks with that". The boy said "watch me old man".

L...

I didn't get this joke ? please help

A young man is sentenced to fifteen years
in prison. The warden
takes a liking to him and puts him in a cell
with a kindly oldtimer
so that he can be shown the ropes and not
get himself in trouble.

So the oldtimer teachs the youngster the
rules of the prison, what
to do, ...

Hunting accident

Two oldtimers Bill and Ted, are out in the woods hunting deer, having a few beers and remembering days gone by.

Suddenly Bill clutches his chest "Aaarh my heart, I think I'm dying, help Ted" and down he goes, out cold no pulse.

Ted grabs his phone and hits 911 "help, I'm in the woods a...

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