UPJOKE
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Obsolete Jokes

Calendars are becoming obsolete.

In fact, I think their days are numbered.

What happens when old Nintendo consoles become obsolete?

People Switch.

Wars would be obsolete if women ruled the world

There would just be a bunch of jealous countries who do not talk to eachother.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Obsolete Technologies

A man is sitting in a recliner watching television when he asks his wife to pass the newspaper.

She starts barking at him,"Why don't you learn how to use this iPad? You're never going to get better at technology if you don't start using it for some of the simple things."

Considering hi...

You want to know what is obsoletely remarkable?!

Whiteboards..

Did you hear that "I before E except after C" rule is obsolete?

It's been proven wrong by science.

Obsolete joke; I went into the video store the other day, I asked if I could rent Batman Forever?

They said “No! But you can have it for three nights!”

A friend of mine lost 200 pounds of excess fat and obsolete tissue in a matter of months.

Better still, he felt great about the divorce.

What do you call a joke that has been internet obsolete for a while?

The Game.

Dinosaur Fact

Towards the end of the Jurassic period, the Thesaurus was the first Dinosaur to become extinct, obsolete, belated, vanished and wiped out.

I asked a young lady at the office to bring me a newspaper

Then I got a lecture about this generation's advanced technology and how old and obsolete I am... At last she gave me her smartphone.


Long story short -

Fly's dead.

Phone's broken.

Girl's crying.

They should make birth control for men

Because it makes more sense to fire blanks than shoot at a bulletproof vest.

Recent discoveries will make this joke obsolete, thought I'd give it one more run.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Young liberal vs. Japanese industrial automation expert

Junji Tsuda, a futurologist, expert as well as advocate for industrial automation, is having an interview on live American TV. The host announced that Mr. Junji Tsuda will be accepting questions from the audience.

After several questions, a member of the audience stood up and started asking:<...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Gym (at 40) - Try and read this without laughing out loud!

Dear Diary

For my fortieth birthday this year, my wife (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me.

Although I am still in great shape since playing football 24 yrs ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

Called ...

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