The Hero: I'm on a quest to avenge the death of my Father!
The Paladin: You have my sword!
The Elf: And my bow!
The Dwarf: And my axe!
The Necromancer: And your father!
What's with all the hate for Necromancers?
Can't a guy raise a family in peace?
What did the necromancer say at the funeral
Hi there I'm Bob the necromancer and today I am going to be doing a unboxing video
Where does a necromancer get skeletons?
He works his zombies to the bone.
Why do necromancers make such good friends?
Because they're great at raising people's spirits.
What do you call it when a Necromancer has issues raising the dead?
Resurrectile Disfunction!
How do you pay a necromancer for their services?
Crypt-o-currency
Necromancers,
They just want you for your body.
What's the difference between a necromancer and a necrophiliac?
One raises the dead, the other is raised by the dead.
What does a necromancer magician say during a magic trick?
Abra-cadaver.
What do necromancers put in their shoes?
Souls
A farmer and a necromancer sit in a bar and lament their suffering
Famer: raising a family is hard.
Necromancer: not if they're buried close enough to each other. With planning and skill, a single spell is all it takes
Farmer: what?
Necromancer: what?
Why couldn't Superman stop the necromancer?
His powers were too weak near the crypt tonight.
What's a necromancer's favorite form of exercise?
Deadlifts.
What did the kleptomaniac necromancer say?
I am a real heart stealer, you know?
Have you heard about what the necromancer movie director did?
He ordered the whole film to be reanimated.
What’s a necromancer’s favorite workout?
A deadlift!
I had to break up with my girlfriend. She was a necromancer.
She wanted us to raise a family together.
Why did the Necromancer with a gambling problem get kicked out of the Slaughterhouse...
He kept raising the steaks.
What’s the hardest part of raising unvaccinated kids?
Finding a reliable necromancer.
What is a necromancer's favorite workout?
Dead lifts
I was gonna tell you the one about the necromancer who liked to abuse animals...
...but it'd just be beating a dead horse.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Sure, he's got his faults, like -- he's a necromancer, and a hoarder...
... but doesn't everybody have a few skeletons in their closet?
Why do necromancer's hate original cartoon shows?
Because they prefer the reanimated versions.
Must be easy to get rich as a necromancer
You'd be making a living!
Mommy told me I should make some friends
So I became a necromancer
I’m pretty sure all history teachers are necromancers
They only care about the dead
What do Christian necromancers say?
Raise the Lord!
Why does the Necromancer hate doing stand-up comedy?
He always has a dead audience
The death of an adventurers brother..
An adventuring party hears of the murder of the fighter's brother.
\>Bard: I swear I will have revenge for my brother!
\>Warrior: You have my sword!
\>Ranger: You have my bow!
\> Necromancer: And your brother! \*whacks corpse on the table\*
A necromancer and a funeral director are at marriage counselling.
Counsellor: So, why are you guys here today?
Funeral Director: “He only wants me for my bodies!”
I will avenge the death of my brother! Who is with me?
Warrior: You have my axe!
Hunter: And my bow!
Necromancer: And your brother!
Why did the Necrophiliac Necromancer raise the dead?
So he could get a res-erection
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
What's the difference between a wizard who raises the undead and a sexy vampire?
One is a necromancer and the other is a neck romancer.
What's the difference between a Lich and a Vampire?
One's a Necromancer. The other, a Neck-Romancer.
How do you call someone who loves to kiss people on their neck?
Neck-romancer.
Also: One can not raise a family in peace these days. Its realy hard to be a necromancer...
What do you call someone who likes to give hickeys?
A necromancer
Why did the witch have so many hickies?
She was dating a necromancer.
Why did the mage take the giraffe out on a date?
Because he was a necromancer.
Credit goes to my (imaginary) 7 year old.
My girlfriend has such a neck fetish,
she barely cares about me she just likes my neck. She's a necromancer.
A warrior’s brother was killed
“By my sword, I shall have vengeance!”, says the warrior.
“And my bow.” Added the elf.
“And my axe.” Added the dwarf.
“And your dead brother.” Added the necromancer.
What do you call a zombie with a hickey?
A necromancer.
RIP GEORGE A ROMERO
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