UPJOKE
kidbabychildchildhoodchildlesschildishchildlikekiddylastbornbairnbratpreteenmiddlebornchildminderpreschooler

Middle Child Jokes

So apparently yesterday was middle child day...

Nobody noticed

Why is Steve Jobs middle child unemployed?

Because he's always inbetween jobs.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three college kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some fuckin’ Steak, and eggs," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs.

She asks her middle child what he wants.
"Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin’ steak, and eggs for me," he says.
She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away.
Finally she asks her youngest son what he wants for breakfast.
"I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three Beautiful Potatoes

Mr and Mrs Potato Head have three beautiful daughters. One night, they're gathered around the dinner table when the eldest daughter speaks up.

"Mom, Dad, I have something to tell you... I'm getting married!"

Mrs Potato Head looks at her "This is such a surprise! Who is he?"

The ...

The eldest of three siblings comes up to his mother and asks: "Mommy, mommy, why is my name Leaf?"

"Well, honey," the mother says, "it's because when you were a little baby, a leaf landed on your head."

Satisfied, the child goes away.

Later, the middle child tugs at her mother's hand. "Mommy, mommy, why is my name Feather?"

"Well, darling," the mother says, "it's because when...

One time I asked a news reporter what the name of his three sons were...

He replied, "My oldest son is Jackson"

"Jeremiah is the middle child"

"And THIS JUSTIN"

How was I born?

One day, three kids went to their mom. The oldest asked, "Mom how was I named?" The mom said, "Well, when we were walking out of the hospital, a rose fell on your head, so we named you rose." The middle child asked, "Mom, how was I named?" The mom said, "When we were walking out of the hospital a li...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man commisions his three kids to each sell a duck

The eldest goes out, and returns having sold the duck for 5 dollars.
The middle child goes out, and returns a tad more successful having sold the duck for 10 dollars.
The youngest child goes out, and while at the market, gets propositioned by a lady of the night. He explains he has no money...

Cannibals in the night

A cannibal wakes up in the night and says to his cannibal wife "I'm starving and we ate the last missionary two days ago." His wife responds "We won't be sent a new missionary for a few days, we've got 3 children, why not have one as a snack?" He thinks it's a great idea, so he eats his youngest chi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 bullets

I don't know if you guys have heard this joke. But here it goes...

There was once a woman who was pregnant with triplets. Unfortunately, one day a burglar came, armed with a gun came into the house and demanded all the cash but they didn't have any to give at hand. The burglar got angry and s...

3 daughters

3 daughters walk to there daddy one at a time...

The oldest girl asks "Daddy how did I get my name?". The father says "a lilly fell on your head as a baby".

The middle child asks the same question and the father says "A rose fell on your head as a baby".

And the youngest girl as...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman 9 months pregnant with triplets is standing in a bank.

She is waiting in line when a masked gunman storms in and fires blindly hitting the woman three times in the stomach. She survives the bank robbery but goes into labor. She has two girls and a boy. Miraculously she survives and so do the triplets. Causing no issues the doctors decided that surgery o...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.