A Linux user, a vegan, and an atheist walk into a bar....
I know because they told everybody there
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Tech Joke: Changing a light bulb
A window user, a Linux user and an apple user all need to change a lightbulb in their respective homes. They split up and the windows and apple user meet back up 5 minutes later
Windows User: Did you get it fixed?
Apple user: No, it can't be cganged so I need to find a new house; how a...
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Why are linux geeks very introvertish ?
Because they never get out of their shell
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How would you spot a linux user?
Don't worry they will tell you themselves!
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Daddy, what are clouds made of?
Linux servers, mostly.
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What is a Linux user's favorite game?
sudo ku
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Who Has The Highest Rank in the Linux Military?
The kernel.
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I have a Linux joke...
But some of you would not apt-get it.
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Why can't you eliminate Satan from Linux?
Because 666 isn't executable.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
3 operating systems walk into a bar
The first says "I'm Windows. The most popular, everyone likes me and I don't mess about. I'll have a pint of lager."
The second says "I'm Mac OS. I'm the favourite of artists and hipsters, and I could never settle for a boring lager like Windows. Give me your hoppiest artisanal IPA!"
T...
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Why do astronauts use Linux?
Because you can't open windows in space.
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New York City is like Linux
* Spend the first year re-learning how to perform basic tasks * Spend the rest of your lifetime claiming how much better it is * Bad drivers
Source: @ chromakode on Twitter
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TIL The Kremlin IT department exclusively uses Linux.
Turns out everyone in the Kremlin has problems with Windows.
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What did the Dalek say when it shot the Linux user?
xterm-inate!
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Why is learning linux stupid?
All of the lessons are full of sudo science
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Did you hear about the herpes program for Linux?
It's open sores
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[Computers] Why do Linux admins always take Xanax?
Because they're constantly battling their daemons.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Saying Java is good because it works on Windows, Linux and Mac OS is like saying...
Anal sex is good because it works on men, women, and animals.
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Breaking news: Yevgeny Prigozhin of the Wagner Group has installed Linux on his computer.
He's trying to stay away from Windows.
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What do you call Linux' bodyguards with no balls?
Unix
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I think a lot of linux package handling systems are not good enough for the task.
But the one with Ubuntu is apt.
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What do you call a group of Linux users?
*Club Penguin.*
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What's the cutest Linux distribution?
UwUbuntu.
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New user: "How come my new printer doesn't work in Linux?" Linus: "You need the right driver."
"My chauffeur's outside."
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I just donated some money to the maintainers of a Linux distribution derived from Red Hat
\*tips fedora\*
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How to make Gnu/Linux run Photoshop?
You serve it WINE.
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Why do vampire's use linux?
Because they don't like windows in their house. Ba^Dum^Tss
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What were the favorite Linux text editors of 8 randomly selected Monty Python fans?
vim, vim, vim, vim, vim, vim, emacs, and vim.
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So a network specialist comes up to me and says "do you wanna here a joke?"
There was a Linux error
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How would you know if someone uses Linux-GNU?
Don't worry, they will tell you
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What is the preferred OS in russia?
Linux, because they are afraid of Windows.
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