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Homeschool Jokes

Homeschoolers are bad at two things

1. Math

Pros of my high school years: I graduated top of my class, was voted prom king, and hooked up with the hottest girl in my grade.

Cons of my high school years: my twin sister and I were homeschooled.

COVID Humor

Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a drinking problem.

I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.

I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerato...

Why isn’t homeschooling more popular in Texas?

It costs a lot of money to field your own football team.

Day one of homeschool teaching

I can’t believe my boyfriend is sleeping with his sons teacher

Homeschooling is going well.

2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

Me and a homeschooler got into an argument about the education system.

He went on a rant about how education in America is broken and asked me, "who's running the education system?"

"Your mom," I replied.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My best friend lost his virginity to one of his teachers

Sounded cool until I remembered he was homeschooled

I had a 69 with my son's teacher,

wait, he's homeschooled. Nevermind.

My Sister always got bullied at school for being adopted.

Homeschooling for us was fun though

Homeschooling cancelled in Alabama

Too many students sleeping with their teachers.

Due to the wave of homeschooling this year, I'm suggesting we change "wake me up when September ends"

To "knock me out when September starts."

I question the Education System

I was kicked out of homeschool, just for making out with the teacher.

I’m so busy with Covid and homeschool that I forgot to drain the kids mac & cheese.

Next time I'll set a Google Colander reminder...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just lost my virginity to the hottest girl in school

I don’t get what the fuss about homeschooling is about

If schools stay closed much longer

I’m worried we’re going to start seeing homeschool shootings soon.

There was a big scandal at my school the other day, two students were suspended and teacher was fired for drinking on the job.

Homeschool is crazy.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My teacher failed me in SexEd because I didn't want to discuss the subject.

Worst part of homeschooling...

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4 friends are hanging out

They’re recalling all the mischief they got into in school. The first one says i used smoke in the bathroom. The second one goes, well I lit off fireworks in class. The third one says that’s nothing, I rode my motorcycle through the hallways. The last one says, I’ve got you all beat, the principle c...

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My eleven year old still doesn't know how to add, thanks to this shitty education system.

Seriously, who thought letting me homeschool him his whole life was a good idea?

I walked into my teachers doing the deed

Goddamn homeschooling

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I never realized how jealous my brother can get. He beat the shit out of me just because I slept with the only girl in our class.

Homeschool problems.

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Two friends were talking

And one said, 'What's the worst thing you've ever done?'

To which he replied, 'I stole some milk from the supermarket one day. What's the worst thing you've ever done?'

'I had sex with my teacher.'

'But I thought you were homeschooled...'

'Yeah...'

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I know a guy that had a sexual relationship with one of his teachers

I suppose there’s a lot less competition when you’re homeschooled

My teacher gave me an F...

So I gave her daughter a D.


But then I realised I was homeschooled.

I just saw my high-school english teacher the other day and she didn't remember me.

I was homeschooled.

I just met my high school English teacher the other day and she didn't remember who I was and it made me sad because..

.. I was her favorite student and was homeschooled.

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The principal was sleeping with my teacher

Everybody knew it, it was so awkward. He was so brash, calling her into his office right in the middle of the school day. The other cool thing about being homeschooled…

The only thing I hate more than my teachers flirting with me...

Is being homeschooled.

Due to a severe increase in Teachers having affairs with their Students,

Homeschooling has been banned by the Governor of Alabama.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was in high school I had to have sex with my teacher so I wouldnt fail algebra...

... homeschool was weird.

Got suspended for cussing out my teacher

Not a bad consequence considering I'm homeschooled

I think I have a crush on my teacher

Me: I think I have a crush on my teacher

Friend: That's gross

Me: I've heard it's pretty common

Friend: But you're homeschooled

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the worst part about having sex with your teacher?

Realizing your homeschooled.

Today I can finally say that I've banged all of my classmates

I'm homeschooled


***Sweet home Alabama***

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I used to be a real player in high school, fucked every girl in my class

Until my mom stopped homeschooling

Did you know? In Alabama...

It's legal to sleep with your teacher? Only if you're homeschooled though.

All of my friends are jealous when they find out I hooked up with my math teacher in high school

But honestly, being homeschooled sucked.

So one time, I had a crush on my female teacher...

But then I remembered I was homeschooled

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My Jr High teacher makes me have sex with her while her husband watches, but that's not the worst part.

....I'm homeschooled.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend once told me that he fucked his teacher.

He also told me that he's homeschooled

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

First the good news: I had sex with my teacher whom I love very much! The bad news....

I'm homeschooled.

A brilliant scientist successfully creates a lifelike deer cyborg.

Dr. Holmes, after many years of biotechnological research, finally succeeded in his secret project, using funds diverted from his research grant. Because the project needed to be kept off the records, Dr. Holmes kept the deer at home.

The cyborg would grow and develop just as a normal fawn wo...

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Guys, I just had sex with one of my teachers!!!!1!

Man, I Love being homeschooled

My friend just told me he has screwed every girl in his class

He is homeschooled

My grade school teacher would often touch me in inappropriate places.

Places like the kitchen and the living room. I hated being homeschooled

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What makes masturbating to your teacher slightly uncomfortable?

You’re homeschooled.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy and his friend are sitting on the couch while having a conversation.

One of them says "hey man, i fucked your teacher in grade 5."

The other says "but, we were homeschooled!"

He says "I know."

The sad tale of George and Karen.

George and Karen were highschool sweet hearts, and got married at 19. They were the perfect couple. Except for one thing.

For ten years, George and Karen gave it their all to have a baby. They calculated her cycles, ate right, and went to doctors. But, in the end Geroge just didn't produce en...

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Little Timmy was in 3rd Grade

One day he went to class and as soon as he sat down, his teacher walked up to him and slammed a test on his desk. “You’re an absolute failure!” she yelled at him. Little Timmy was devastated, he’d never been yelled at like this before, but he bottled up his emotions and did his work. The class ended...

I'm worried about my friend. He was bragging about getting a handjob from his teacher.

I said, "That's disgusting, you're homeschooled."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My neighbor kid had weird religious parents.

They homeschooled their kids and put them in old fashioned clothes. The boy my age they named Holy and constantly reminded him to live up to his name and live a holy life. He took it seriously but over time it became a burden along with the teasing he got for having a weird name. At 17 he had a ment...

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