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Groome Jokes

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An elderly gentleman walks into an upscale cocktail lounge. He is in his mid-80s, well-dressed, hair well-groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel and smelling slightly of an expensive after shave. He presents a very nice image.

Seated at the bar is a classy looking lady in her mid-70s.

The sharp old gentleman walks over and sits alongside her. He orders a drink and takes a sip.

He slowly turns to the lady and says: "So, tell me; do I come here often?"

The Confused Owner of Two Horses

He had two horses, but every time he had to deal with them, he always mixed them up, so he never knew which one got fed or the one that needed to be groomed.

While talking to a bunch of his friends, someone suggested that he could measure both horses to tell them apart. When he got back...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why wouldn’t any participants at the cat show accept the award for best groomed behind?

Because the prize was a catastrophe.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Blonde woman is walking two dogs, one White and the other Black.

An Old lady walking down the same street notices them and since it's a breed she's never seen before, she's curious and walks up to the woman. "Wow, these dogs are adorable. What kind are they?". The Blonde smiles and goes "Which one, the white one or the black one?".

The old lady is a little...

Following the death of Queen Elizabeth, Prince Andrew has been given the role of looking after the corgis.

At least they will be well groomed.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A very elderly gentleman,mid ninety's,very well dressed, hair well groomed,great suit,flower in his lapel smelling slightly of a good aftershave,presenting a well looked after image,walks into an upscale cocktail lounge.

Seated at the bar is an elderly lady,mid eighties.

The gentleman walks over,sits along side of her,orders a drink,takes a sip,turns to her and says"So tell me do I come here often?"

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation,

"I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well-behaved.

Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, that said, "I've been operating this hotel for many years. ...

In romance, I'm like a wild stallion

I'm not well groomed, look somewhat malnourished, don't want anyone to ride me, am threatened by eye contact, and if approached I'm likely to run away before anyone's close enough to touch me.

What do you call Leonardo DiCaprio and his fiance on their wedding day?

Bride and Groomer

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