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A gray haired Army general walks into a hotel bar and sits down next to a young, attractive woman.

They hit it off, and she likes a man in uniform, so she says, “Why don’t you come up to my room?”

The general says, “I’m flattered but at my age I’m not sure if things would work the way you hope.”

She says, “But you’re in good shape...tell me, when was the last time you had sex?”
<...

For the first time in history, a US president haven't grown old, gray haired and tired by the stressful tasks of his presidency ...

... Instead everyone else did.

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A little girl goes up to her mom and asks “Why are you getting gray hair?”

A little girl goes up to her mom and asks “Why are you getting gray hair?” The mother responds, well every time you do something that upsets me I vet a gray hair.

The girl thinks for a minute. Then says, wooow you must of really pissed off grandma.

My wife said she found my first gray hair, but I didn't believe her for the longest time. Then when I was brushing my teeth this morning I saw it in the mirror, on the left side of my mustache.

It was right under my nose this whole time.

It's great to have gray hair.

Ask anyone who's bald.

why parents have gray hair ..

Just a reminder........
Why Parents Have Gray Hair

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed nicely made up and everything neat and tidy.

Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad". With the worst premonition, he o...

It's interesting how different a US president looks at the end of their presidency. Obama had gray hair. Bush had a bunch of wrinkles..

At the end of JFKs presidency, half of his head was missing.

The day I found my first gray hairs...

I thought I'd dye!

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A crook robs an old man with gray hair...

A crook runs out of an alleyway to rob an old man with gray hair.

He runs up in front of the man, pulls out a gun and then says, “Give me all your money!"
The old man says, "But I work in congress!"
Enraged, the crook yells, "THEN GIVE ME ALL OF MY MONEY!"

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.

Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. Amazing, he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring....

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An 18 year old Italian girl gets pregnant...

She tells her Mother that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!" The girl p...

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The old man and the elevator.

An old man from the country takes his family to town for the first time. They're at the mall and the mall has an elevator. Him and his son are watching this thing in amazement as they never saw one before and was not sure what it was. An older lady at least 80 with Gray hair in rollers and a walkin...

A man is driving a car next to a mental asylum when his tire ruptures.

He stops and gets out of the car to change it.

But through the fence, a patient with gray hair, long unkempt beard, dressed in a nightgown, and with a creepy doll in his arms watches him silently.

The man tries to ignore him, but the stare makes him extremely anxious. His hands start...

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a phone call from a gorgeous ex

I received a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend who, this morning, called 'out-of-the-blue' to see if I was still around. We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic times we used to enjoy together.
I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in m...

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An old Justin Wilson joke

An old, crotchety farmer woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. The man clutched his chest and fumbled for the telephone to call an ambulance, fearing that he was having a heart attack.

Upon arriving at the hospital, the man, stable but still in quite a bit of pain, was greeted ...

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Ornithology

This joke was told to me by an older man that is a retired engineer.

>Back in the 60's when I was in engineering school, I needed an easy filler class. I was already loaded down with calculus, physics, and engineering classes, so when I saw Ornithology, I decided to sign up. It only met 1 ...

Trump is really good about his ears.

He wears ear plugs at loud concerts.
He makes sure his ear wax doesn’t build up.
He keeps the gray hairs growing out of his ears nice and trimmed.

He’s quite possibly the most ear responsible president we’ve ever had.

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Beaver...

This little girl takes a shower with her mom. She looks up and says "mom what are those?" "Those are my breasts" the mother replied. "You will get these when you get older." Then the little girl looks down and says "mom what's that?" "That is my beaver, you will get hair on your when you get older."...

Mississippi Social Security

A man from Mississippi tells his wife that he's of age and next moth he's going to get social security. She says honey now honey how you gonna do that with drivers license no SS card no birth certificate? He says "now you look here girl tomorrow I'm gonna get it". The next day he's down at the s...

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