UPJOKE
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A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a £20 fell out onto the sidewalk. Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, “Ma’am, there are £20 notes falling out of that bag.”

“Oh, really? Darn it!” said the little old lady. “I’d better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer.
“Well, now, not so fast,” said the cop.“Where did you get all that money? You didn’t steal it, did you?”
“Oh, no, no”, said the old lady. “You see, my back garden is ...

Every time I buy garbage bags,

it feels like I am throwing money away.

Epstein is like a full garbage bag

It’s not gonna take itself out.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A police officer sees an old lady dragging two large garbage bags down the sidewalk...

He takes a closer look and sees that one of the bags has a small tear in it and $20 bills are escaping from the hole every few yards. The officer approaches the lady and asks what's in the bags. "This one's filled with $20 bills", she replies. "Where did you get all that money?", the policeman enqui...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

And old woman is carrying two garbage bags...

I was walking down the street, and I saw this elderly woman, carrying two garbage bags. I walked up to her in amazement and asked: 'My lady, what's in those bags?'
She looks mildly amused and said: 'Well, I live next to a pub, and after all those men have downed a couple, they crawl into my garde...

What do you call two homeless people hitting each other with garbage bags?

A Pillow Fight

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Joke translated from arabic

Three men were at a woman's house while her husband is at work. But he decided to come home early. Hearing the sound of the car, the woman told them to hide. With not enough time, they hid under garbage bags. The man walks in and asks his wife "What are those bags?"

The woman says:"my father ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three men arrive in Heaven at the same time.

As they approach the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter appears before them.

"The rules are simple: to get into Heaven, first you have to tell me how you die. If I'm satisfied with your story, you can come in."

The first man steps forward.

"Imagine this. You come home to your sixth-floo...

Take my wife... please.

You grab these garbage bags, I'll grab these.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Four scientists are driving down the road, when...

Four famous scientists are driving together and get pulled over.

The cop walks up and yells at the driver, "You were going 100 miles an hour!" Heisenberg throws up his hands and yells back, "Great! Now I'm lost."

"What's in that garbage bag you're holding?" the cop asks the front passe...

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A woman is cheating on his husband and having group sex with three men...

When all of a sudden, the husband returns home from work early.

In a panic, the three men run to the backyard stark naked, and looking around, they see three large garbage bags and decide to hide in them and so each one gets into a bag.

The husband comes in the bathroom, sees his wife...

Three people are running from the cops.

Three people are running from the cops. The first hides behind a fence, the second behind some garbage bags, and the third in a sack of potatoes.

The cops walk by the fence and hear "ruff ruff" so they think "oh, it must just be a dog" and walk by.

The cops walk past the garbage cans a...

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