A young woman goes to a fortuneteller. The fortuneteller tells her that she will be broke and unhappy until she turns fifty.

“What happens when I turn fifty?” the young woman asks, staring down at the cards.

“Oh, nothing,” said the fortuneteller. “You’ll just be used to it by then.”

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Hitler went to a fortuneteller

He went and asked her - " On which day will I die ? "
The seeress ensured him that he will die on a Jewish holiday.
" Why are you so sure about that ? " Demanded the angry Hitler.

" Any day " she replied, " On which day you die will be a Jewish holiday ".

A man goes to the carnival

A man goes to the carnival with his family, and they decide to split up to enjoy the rides. The husband walks by a tent with a sign advertising a fortuneteller. He doesn't believe in such things,but decides to go inside anyway.

A woman looks up from a small table with a crystal ball and spea...

Putin decides to invade Poland

Putin decides to invade Poland. But first, he wants to check the future situation in his country by visiting a fortuneteller.

Putin: Hello! I'd like to ask how much would a 0,7l bottle of vodka in Moscow 2016 cost.

Fortuneteller: Hmmm... it seems about twenty.

Putin: Rubles?!?...

Fortune Teller

The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large!

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