UPJOKE
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Dry Ice Jokes

I remember having a dry ice presentation in middle school.

It was sublime.
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I was dared to eat a spoonful of dry ice.

It tasted sublime!
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There's a guy sneaking around in grocery stores in my town dropping chunks of dry ice in boxes of cereal.

We're being attacked by a cereal chiller!

: As told by my 5 year old.
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How do you make a dog sound like a cat?

Put it in dry ice for a day, stick it on a bandsaw:  the dog goes "MRRRRRROW".

How do you make a cat sound like a dog?

Douse it in gasoline and strike a match:  the cat goes "WOOF!"

(no animals were harmed in the creation of this joke.)
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A man went to the wishing well.

He wished for a superpower, any superpower at all.

The next day, he accidentally rammed into the wall, biting on the paint. He then dissolved into a sentient puddle, able to cover the places he moved around in paint.

"Whoa!" he said, changing out of that form. He rushed over to bite a...
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Aboriginal Rituals

A couple years back, I stumbled on a surprising reference to the astonishing longevity of Aboriginal shamans living in the Australian outback. Reliable birth records aren't available before the early 20th century, but government officials have noted an astounding number of nonagenarians and centenar...
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