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Churchgoers Jokes

Which actor is always criticising churchgoers?

Christian Slater.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A note to a priest (Long).

A young priest was about to lead his first mass. Because he was nervous, the bishop told him to put a bit of vodka in the wine and drink a bit before the mass. The priest did that.

Then his memory shuts out, and after a few hours, he wakes up with a note saying:

"My son, I have a few ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[NSFW] A priest and an old blind woman who plays the church organ, are preparing for the weekly sermon.

Every week, the organ player eats a banana to keep her energy up before the crowds arrive, but she always seems to have terrible trouble peeling it.

The priest sees an opportunity and decides to swap the banana for his penis. The organ player grabs his tackle and starts fondling it.

...

The competition of the priests

Three priests - a Catholic, a Protestant and a Jewish are competing against each other. The task is to convert a bear to their religion.

 

After a few days, the Catholic priest calls the others to his church and says: "Look! I've converted the bear to Catholicism and now he's...

An old woman is having her 90th birthday.

She has three sons, and each of them has been very successful in life. They realized this might be her last year, and each decided to get something special for her.

The first got thought that she must find the same old house boring after living in it for all her life and bought her a mansion....

Two vicars are talking on the street

"my bicycle was stolen from outside the church"

"have you thought about the police?

"I don't think the police would do a thing like that.. I'm joking, it was probably one of the churchgoers"

"I have an idea. In your next sermon, read out the ten commandments. when you get to, 't...

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