Chickpea Jokes - 21 Hilarious Chickpea Jokes

What's the difference between Black Eyed Peas and Chickpeas?

Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song and Chickpeas can only Hummus one.

What's the difference between a chickpea and a pinto bean?

I never had a pinto bean on my face

What's the difference between a potato and a chickpea?

I've never paid to watch a potato.

Edit - Cheers for my first award, much obliged.

What’s the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I didn’t pay $100 to have a lentil on my face.

What did the chickpea say when it got sick?

I falafel.

What do you call it when someone kills a chickpea?

Hummus-cide.

My wife and I found this GREAT chickpea spread.....

it's so good we wish it could SING. But all it could do was hummus a tune.

Did you hear about a chickpea who died saving his friend in the war?

He received a posthummus medal.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a chickpea that's fallen in love with another chickpea?

A hummousexual.

Did you hear about the funeral for the mashed up chickpea?

It was a posthumous celebration

A chickpea got called to a murder scene

It was a hummucide

Why did the chickpea get arrested?

He committed a Hummus-cide

Q: What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

A: I didn't pay $50 to have a lentil on me last night.

What’s the difference between a chickpea and a Brazilian nut?

I wouldn’t let a chickpea in my mouth.

whats the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea?

donald trump has never had a garbanzo bean on his face.

A professor finds a cure for cancer right before falling into a vat of chickpea dip and dying

He was awarded post-hummous-ly

What's the difference between a soybean and a chickpea?

Donald Trump wouldn't pay $500 to have a soybean in his mouth.

What do you call it when a chickpea gets killed?

Hummuside

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?

It's no use going to Pornhub to watch a hot garbanzo bean.

Someone died eating chickpea dip...

It was ruled a hummuscide.

How do make a chickpea soup?

You can’t. The closest you can hope for is for her to have diarrhea.

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