“A man being diagnosed”

The doctor said, “pick a star sign, any star sign”.
The man said, “Uh, Capricorn”,
The doctor replied,”sorry mate, you got Cancer”

[On a date] Her: So, what do you do?

Him: I’m working on eliminating all cancers.

Her: Wow! That’s really impressive.

Him: Then I’ll move on to Capricorns.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Me and my ex-girlfriend just weren't meant to be together, she was a Capricorn...

and I don't believe in bullshit

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go camping

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are out camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Suddenly, in the middle of the night Holmes wakes Watson up.

"Look up, Watson," Holmes says, "and tell me what you see."

"I see billions of stars," says Watson.

"And what do yo...

I walked into the Doctors Surgery and he said to me, "Pick a star sign, any star sign.

" "Capricorn." I replied.



"Yeah, right," he tutted. "As if I'm about to tell you that you have Capricorn. Try again."

I told my superstitious friend I was having knee pains

She said "I have been reading into astrology and its said that Capricorn, the sea-goat, has more knee pains. Are you a Capricorn?"

I said "No ma'am. I'm a Taurus, and that's bull."

So a woman walks out of a doctor's office

and she stops at the door, looks back at the doctor and says :

- What was it again ? Sagittarius, Capricorn ?
- No ma'am, CANCER !

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