Tortuga Jokes

"I note that you have had a lot of injuries... I see you have a wooden leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch. What caused those?"

The old pirate nodded. "Piratin' is a rough life indeed. I was a mere deckhand on me first ship, and we met up with an British dreadnaught. Twas a fierce battl... read more

I met a pirate today at the bus stop, as I was waiting for the 151 bus to go downtown. I know he was a pirate, because he had an eyepatch, and a hook, and a peg leg, the whole deal. That, and I asked him.
"Excuse me, sir, but are you a pirate?" I asked.
"Arr, I be a pirate, aye."
"Oh, that ... read more

After thirteen months of sailing the seven seas, a battle-worn schooner filled to the brim with booty and booze makes port in the rag-tag pirate isle of Tortuga.

The captain - a buccaneer known the world over for his utter lack of mercy, his terrible greed, and his hearty girth - lumbers off ... read more