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Breaking Wind Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man has a habit of starting every morning by breaking wind.

Of course, his wife finds this habit disgusting, and even as she asks him to stop, he only snickers, continuing the habit every morning.

After one of the husband's daily bouts of morning flatulence, the woman tells him that if he continues to fart every morning, his intestines will come out ...

What do you call a brotherhood brought together by their love of breaking wind?

A Farternity

An English businesswoman explained to her doctor that she was always breaking wind.

At board meetings, during interviews,in lifts and on trams -- it was impossible to control. "But at least I'm fortunate in two respects," she told her doctor. "They neither smell nor make a noise. In fact, you'll be surprised to know I've let two go since I've been talking to you."
The doctor rea...

What do you call a donkey with one leg?

A wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye?
A winky wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye making love?
A bonky winky wonky donkey

What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, making love while breaking wind? <...

Tie a ribbon

A woman is at home one night with just the dog because her husband is out drinking again. But the dog keeps farting, and he's stinking up the house. So she calls up her best friend and asks if she has any ideas about this.

"Tie a ribbon firmly around the dog's genitals," she said. "That sh...

An old woman goes to the doctor's and says she has an embarrassing problem...

She knows when she's breaking wind but it doesn't make any sound and has lost any sort of stinkiness that it used to have.

She went on to say that in fact she'd done it three times since coming in the room- and that as it's just so unnatural, it's really bothering her. He gives her some pills...

The Queen gets older...

As she grew older, the Queen became rather flatulent. One day, she was receiving foreign ambassadors when she was unable to stop herself from loudly breaking wind. Immediately, the quick-witted French ambassador stepped forward, made an elegant bow and very gallantly said: “I beg Your Majesty’s apol...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Flatulence problem...

**Okay, so I usually post my own jokes, but I thought i'd switch it up with one of my faves that's not written by me:**



There was an old married couple that had lived happily together for nearly forty years. The only friction in their marriage was caused by the husband's habit of brea...

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