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What did the doctor say to the patient suffering from a bacterial infection?

Ah, I see you're a man of culture as well

What do you call a bacterial disease caused by two grizzlies?

Twobearculosis.

Why did Shakespeare get so many bacterial infections?

Because he only had quillicillin

I took a video of my symptoms that suggested a bacterial infection

it turned out to be viral.

Did you hear about the bacterial outbreak in the office?

They said it was a staff infection.

A little bacteria was celebrating his birthday...

and all of his microbial friends got together to bake him a cake.

He was so excited upon seeing the cake that he underwent mitosis and split in two.

The microbial friends all worried that now there werent enough cakes, and that perhaps they should have planned better...

But actu...

How are nuggets made?

Bacterial Meningitis

My father’s sister is obsessed with killing germs,

we call her Auntie Bacterial.

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