UPJOKE
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Autobot Jokes

What did Optimus Prime say when he came back from Ikea?

Autobots, assemble!


(edit : a big ♥ to all the kind people who made this silly post live despite the fact I mix up Autobots and Avengers. Long live the Autovengers!)

Optimus Prime: Autobots, roll out!

Pessimus Prime: Why? We’ll just lose...

Which Autobot is the most likely to have Chlamydia?

Hot Rod

Why do the Autobots do their Christmas shopping at night?

Because that's when they get pajamas on Prime.


It's okay, even I would downvote this.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What happens when you give an Autobot a blowjob?

The power goes out.

Why do the Autobots have a positive outlook on the future?

Because their leader is Optimist Prime.

Why did the paint job in the Autobots home base look so nice?

Because Optimus Primed!

We lost power at work today due to someone hitting a transformer.

I never heard if it was a Decepticon or an Autobot.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Autobots had just landed on our green planet.

Optimus tells them to go look for disguises that are suitable so that they can all adequately blend into their new home. Two hours pass and the Autobots reconvene.

Mr Prime: Do you all have suitable disguises?

Company: Yes, Mr Prime.

Mr Prime: Well then, let's see it.

The...

I went on a spirit journey, and learned my ancestral guide is Optimus Prime.

It was an Autobot-y experience.

My wife found me in the kitchen naked holding my gun

"What the hell are you doing?" she screamed, shocked at my appearance.

"Quiet woman! I'm hunting Autobots!!" I whispered back harshly.

She put her hands on her hips. "You've been sleep walking again! There are no such thing as Autobots!"

I blinked, realizing how stupid I looked....

What does Optimus Prime say when he wants a symphonic band?

"Autobots, ensemble!"

What do you get when you differentiate Optimus?

The leader of the Autobots!

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