If you took all of the blood vessels in your body and laid them end to end across a football field

you would die.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you know if you took all the human blood vessels and layed them out end to end

You would go to prison and they would make a documentary about you. You sick fuck

Fun fact: if you take a man, remove all of his blood vessels and lay them out end to end...

He’ll die

What do you call a blood vessel with a carrot jammed into it?

A carroted artery.

I failed my medical school entrance exam because of nerves.

The correct answer was blood vessels.

Did you hear about the boat full of gang members?

It was a blood vessel.

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The New York Philharmonic was conducting a rendition of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony

If you are not familiar with Beethoven's 9th Symphony it's a tremendous piece of work, but the bass line is atrocious. Not because it is complicated, but because it goes like this:

**"bbbaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"**



And then approximately an hour an a half later it goes li...

What kind of ship does a vampire like?

A blood vessel

Some engineers were arguing about God.

One says, "God was clearly a mechanical engineer. Just look at the structure of the bones, how they're shaped to carry their loads without wasted weight, how the joints interlock to give free movement, how the muscles are optimally placed as actuators with the best leverage."

The second repli...

What do vampires cross the sea in?

Blood vessels.

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What do you call a used Tampon floating down a river?

A blood vessel.

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