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Yikes Jokes

To be fair, Donald Trump HAS created a lot of jobs.

It’s going to take a lot of people to clean up this mess.

The doctor said to me, “Your brain seems to have deleted all information about 80's pop music!” I gasped, “Yikes! What’s The Cure?!”

He yowled, “Oh my God! It’s worse than I thought!”

A woman boards a bus with her baby.

The bus driver looks at her baby and exclaims, "Yikes! That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!"

The woman, now obviously upset, walks to the back of the bus and finds a seat next to another man. She says, "I'm upset, the driver just insulted me!"

The man responds, "You shouldn't let an...

What is Caitlyn Jenner going as for Halloween?

An Ex-Man

Preemptive Edit: Proudly! Proudly going as an Ex-Man! Yikes....

I was flirting with a woman and asked her what's one thing she's most talented at

She said "I'm a great liar!"

I thought to myself, *yikes*, not a very good thing to admit.

But at least she's honest!

Mom: “What time are we leaving?”

Dad: “9:15”

Mom: “OK, I’ll jump in the shower real quick”

Dad: “Yikes, be careful, it’s slippery in there”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A kid surprises his father on the couch... [NSFW]

- Dad!! What are you doing??
- Son, this is called masturbation, and you will soon do it as well.
- Yikes!! Why would I do that???
- Because my hand is getting tired.

An Angel came to Mary

"She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel. "

To which Mary replied, "Yikes... I kinda already picked out Jesus"

A guy walks into a bar...

He says "ouch!" the bartender says "what happened" the guy says "I walked into your bar!"

The tender comes around and see's a piece of rebar sticking out of the wall. "Yikes, here come take a seat at the bar and ill pour you a drink"... He turns around to see the man sitting on the ground be...

The CIA are training assassins

Two men and a woman make it into the final test

The first man walks into the final test room and the CIA says “Behind that door is your wife walk in and shoot her”

The man says “Oh no, I can’t do that, I really can’t”
So the CIA escort him out the building

The second man wal...

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