The CEO of a hardware company calls in his top ad man and tells him, "We need a new TV spot for our B&Q Nails line."

A week later, the ad man comes back with a videotape and pops it into the VCR in the CEO's office. The commercial starts and the CEO sees Jesus being nailed to the cross while a voice over says, "B&Q nails: they get the job done." The CEO is irritated and says, "That is completely unacceptable! ...

Why did David Bowie's VCR always flash "12:00"?

Because although time may change him, he can't change time.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fun fact: if you tape four sticks of butter together...

and put it in a VCR, it starts to play a biopic of Paula Dean

It's a lot of rubbish when people talk about "how good" modern kids are these days with technology.

My grandson is staying for the weekend, and he looks absolutely clueless with my VCR and VHS tapes.

Renting a dirty video

A blonde decides to do something she"s never done before - rent a dirty movie. She drives to the local Video Warehouse and makes here way to the adult section in the back.

After looking around at titles, she selects a something that sounds very stimulating.She drives home, lights some candles...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blonde decided to rent her first porno...

...so she went to the video store and picked out a tape with a title that sounded sexy. She drove home, lit some candles, took off her clothes and placed the tape in the VCR, but nothing appeared on her screen except static. So she called the video store and complained. She said "I just rented a por...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Funny Jewish joke

Before you ask, no this is not an offensive jew joke, it is jewish humor:

A man by the name of Gotlieb called his Rabbi and said, "I know tonight is Kol Nidre, but tonight the Yankees start the playoffs. Rabbi, I'm a life long Yankee fan.
"I've got to watch the Yankee game on TV".
T...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

red hot chili peppers joke (original)

So Anthony Kiedis is hanging out at Flea's house. Flea says he's having trouble hooking up his VCR to his TV and he asks Anthony to take a look at it, to see if he can find the problem.

Anthony gets up and takes a look behind the TV at the wires and cables and whatnot.

"I think the pr...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.