I finally bought the limited edition thesaurus that I've always wanted. When I opened it, all the pages were blank.

I have no words to describe how angry I am.

I bought the world's worst thesaurus today.

Not only was it terrible, but it was also terrible

One time at school, I lost my thesaurus.

I couldn't find the words to describe how upset I was.

A truck loaded with thousands of copies of Thesaurus' crashed on the highway last Thursday.

According to the Daily news, witnesses were stunned, startled, aghast, taken aback, stupefied, confused, shocked, rattled, paralyzed, dazed, bewildered, surprised, dumbfounded, flabbergasted, astounded, amazed, confounded, astonished, boggled, horrified, numbed, and perplexed that items falling off ...

I've spent my isolation reading the thesaurus.

Because a mind is a terrible thing to garbage.

What do you find if you look up the word thesaurus in a thesaurus?


Someone stole my thesaurus.

I'm so angry. Really angry. Just so angry.

What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast?

A synonym roll.

My new thesaurus is terrible

In fact I'd go as far to say it's terrible.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man looses his thesaurus.

He searches all over his house for it. He’s double checked everywhere, but he just can’t find it. Fed up with searching, he decides to ask his family members.

His daughter loves reading books, so he decided to ask her first.

Man: Did you take my thesaurus?

Daughter: ...

After reading the thesaurus I have a strong vocabulary of useless synonyms.

They’re unnecessary, worthless and redundant.

Rule number 1 of the thesaurus club:

Never discuss, mention, speak of, or talk about Thesaurus Club.

What do you call a dinosaur that knows all the words?

A thesaurus.

I typed “ninjas” into thesaurus.com. It said “ninjas cannot be found.”

Well played ninjas, well played.

I bought a new thesaurus today.

It's nothing to write house about.

I used to be poor. Then I bought a thesaurus.

Now I'm impecunious.

A Dictionary and a Thesaurus are in a library...

A Dictionary and a Thesaurus are in a library. The librarian who has taken good care of them for years and years is retiring. Understandably, the Dictionary and Thesaurus are both sad.

The Thesaurus says to the Dictionary "I can see how distraught you are."

The Dictionary responds "Yo...

Me: Did you steal my thesaurus

Horse: Nope

Thesauruses are, for lack of a better word,


A thesaurus walks into a bar

, pub, inn, tavern, bistro, watering hole.

Man, I hate this new thesaurus I got

I can’t even find the words to describe how useless it is.

I’ve written a theatre production called “Thesaurus.”

It’s a play on words

I went to the store today to buy a thesaurus..

They had none left. It was just terrible, and terrible.

I was angry at my roommate for buying a new thesaurus every week

So i told her "Enough is enough!"

People keep telling me to get a thesaurus

But aren't all dinosaurs not existing forever?

The author of what’s been described as “the world’s worst thesaurus” has dismissed the comments.

He’s described the comments as unfair, unfair and unfair.

I swallowed a dictionary

And now I have thesaurus throat I've ever had.

Someone at school stole my thesaurus.

I just can't describe how angry I am.

(Edit: credit to emul4tion for suggesting a tighter version of my original)

In this day and age, keeping a paper thesaurus around the house is as useless as....

Um....as useless.....as.....um.....

To whoever stole my thesaurus...

To whoever stole my thesaurus, you made my day bad. I hope bad things happen to you. You're a bad person.

I tried using a thesaurus to find synonyms for useless.

The result was futile.

First Rule of Thesaurus Club:

You don't talk, discuss, converse, speak, chat, confer, deliberate, gab, or gossip about Thesaurus Club.

I’ll give up my thesaurus...

when you pry it from my frosty, frozen, lifeless, stiff extremities.

Tyrannosaurus: growl

**Thesaurus:** roar, bark, snarl

Not only is my new Thesaurus terrible...

but it also died 65 million years ago

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I hate being used as a thesaurus.

A mate just asked another term for "monkey dung" and I went apeshit.

I ate a dictionary today...

I had thesaurus throat ever.

My son told me that, and I was surprised to see it wasn't a Reddit favorite for reposting

My new Thesaurus arrived today, and it's terrible.

And another thing, it's terrible.

What's a thesaurus's favorite cereal?

Synonym Toast Crunch

I see your thesaurus joke and raise you mine. Did you here about the truck full of thesauruses that crashed?

Onlookers were shocked, astounded, agape, flabbergasted, and taken aback.

Why did the thesaurus have a creeping feeling?

He had an antonym.

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